I came across this quote in one of my Advent devotional books (Watch for the Light) the other day and it made me stop and think:
This is often the way God loves us: with gifts we thought we didn't need, which transform us into people we don't necessarily want to be.
~William Willamon, on December 14
I really do want to be transformed into a person who reflects Jesus to the world around me, so I'm not sure about the second part of that quote. But I do agree that the ways in which God molds and shapes me and loves me are often through circumstances I'd rather do without.
And yet.
The hardest times in my life have been the sweetest gifts God has given me. Because the heartache and turmoil and pain and sorrow was worth the growth and intimacy with him that came from it. I can say with certainty (knowing myself--and my mother would agree) that I would not have learned some of those same lessons if the circumstances hadn't been so extreme. Often hard lessons are the ones we learn best.
So why have I been resisting the circumstances I've found myself in lately?
In a weird way, it's been familiar and even oddly comfortable to be back in a place of total dependence, of desperation, of crying out to God for his mercy and love and presence. Though the circumstances are different, the center of these circumstances is a safe place I've been before.
What would happen if we regarded our hardships, our trials, our disappointments as gifts? Gifts from a faithful and loving Father for our good, not for our harm. Gifts to give us a future and a hope. Gifts to transform us into the image of his Son, whom he loves.
I'm so glad you shared this. Especially:
"In a weird way, it's been familiar and even oddly comfortable to be back in a place of total dependence, of desperation, of crying out to God for his mercy and love and presence. Though the circumstances are different, the center of these circumstances is a safe place I've been before."
Now and then (more now lately) I go off my (granted, miniscule dose) of meds (aka The Happy Pill) because I get too...(I would say happy, but that's not the word)...complacent; comfy; independant. And after a couple of weeks I find myself in the middle of a huge PHYSICAL failure, although my mental, emotional and especially my spiritual state has been just fine. I hear Him better, I seek Him more. But the physical downfall (how the stress in my life takes it toll on my physical body) drives me back to my little green pill once again. And does it ever take awhile to get the physical part back. Oy. But with it comes the struggle to hear Him and seek Him once again. I don't want His voice blocked out by my perceived (okay, medicated) lack of need of Him. In fact...I hate that part. If I could just get the physical fallout under control I think I would gladly embrace the mental and emotional stress in order to be in constant connection with Him.
Okay, I'm totally not going back to proof/read all of that over because just typing it was 1) painful (not physically); 2) awkward; and 3) sounding whacked even to me.
I think you get my point, though. Please tell me you get my point. lol.
Posted by: Susan | December 17, 2008 at 01:35 PM
Sometimes it's so difficult to view the tough times as gifts because: 1) I want to be in control and 2) I'm spoiled.
Yet as I've been praising Him for how faithful He's been this past year, I glimpse how faithful He will be in this particular circumstance. It's a change, and I'm a creature of habit (which is part and parcel of the problem, I believe)...but it's going to bring me closer to Him & that's something to get excited about.
Praying for you!
Posted by: Melissa @ Breath of Life | December 17, 2008 at 02:10 PM
This is just what I needed to read today. Thanks for sharing your heart on this. It's been a tough day for me today, and I just thought, not even 2 hours ago, "Why does God use suffering at times to bring us closer to Him?" This year has been so painful for us as a family, and I feel like Jacob, in a way, wrestling with God all through the night. Thanks for reminding me that there is beauty in it all, that there is joy in the morning and that ultimately, God is molding me and reshaping me.
Posted by: Beth | December 18, 2008 at 03:33 PM
Beautifully written, and such a timely and precious reminder for many, including me. :)
Posted by: Steffany | December 19, 2008 at 02:14 PM
This is so true and if we try hard to remember this it can give us strength to get through. My difficult issue seems like it is never going to get resolved, but deep down I know it will and we will keep chipping away until we are debt free. When I force myself to I can see all I have learned during this time about being humble and not prideful. It is hard to remember that sometimes though when you are in the midst of it.
Posted by: Michele K | December 19, 2008 at 05:26 PM
A timely reminder indeed. Thank you, thank you.
Posted by: Marla Taviano | December 19, 2008 at 08:44 PM
A timely reminder indeed. Thank you, thank you.
Posted by: Marla Taviano | December 19, 2008 at 08:44 PM
You're singing my song, telling my story, and evidently writing my blog post! :-) Well said.
Posted by: Lisa writes... | December 19, 2008 at 09:30 PM
Thanks for sharing this, so true. Thanks for the encouragement to 'advent'.
Posted by: Laura | December 20, 2008 at 06:46 AM
I'm afraid I'm not great at "considering it all joy" when trials occur. But you're absolutely right: grace in a yucky package is still...grace.
Posted by: Gretchen | December 21, 2008 at 02:51 PM