Spiritual Mothering: Chapter 2 and a little video

Chapter 2 is titled "A Life-Purpose." I have to say that this is what so much of this book is about. Are we living for God's glory in all we do? Chances are that the more we focus on that purpose, the more nurturing we will be to those around us--other women, our own children, other people's children, you name it.

Here are this week's questions:

1. In the first short section of chapter 2, Hunt talks about the second-pivotal principle of spiritual mothering: that our life-purpose is to glorify God. The driving force of any spiritual mothering relationship is not the relationship, but God's glory.

How does this alter/change/influence/affect what you've thought so far about this topic? Does it change how you perceive this kind of mentoring? If so, how?

2. Much of the chapter examines Mary. "I fear that too often we do not hold Mary up as an example, because we are overcompensating for some who have elevated her above humanity. This robs us of one of the most beautiful examples of faith found in Scripture...In Mary we do see a woman who embraced God's glory as her reason for being and translated that into her experience" (page 26).

What struck you fresh about Mary's story after reading this chapter? 

3. Hunt made a couple of statements about Mary's response to the angel:

"This young woman handled the situation without her brain or her emotions being scrambled" (page 27).

"This was no emotional reaction but rather a deliberate and logical response based upon the character and promises of God" (page 28).

How do these statements compare to how you typically respond to something? Are you more on the side of being scrambled, or more deliberate and logical?

How does/should having a life-purpose of glorifying God and an identity of being the Lord's servant affect our response any kind of situation?

4. On page 32, Hunt distinguishes between confidence based on our identity in Christ and self-confidence. How do you see these as being different?

5. If you had to pick a sentence or a phrase from this chapter to write on your bathroom mirror to see each and every day, what would you pick? Why?

6. Anything else you want to add, highlight, or ask everyone else to answer? Have at it!

Feel free to write your own blog post and leave a link in the comments or to write your answers directly in the comments here. Be sure to check back on this post (and last week's here) as there's some back-and-forth conversation going on. Which totally thrills me. I love seeing my friends become friends!

Don't forget that you have to hang on after you type your comment and preview it to type in the word verification thing-y. I know it's a pain, but it prevents spam. I didn't used to use it, but after getting TONS of spam comments on some older posts, I turned it on.

And if ever you get totally frustrated, send me an email and I'll put your comments up in a comment from my computer.

I put up a couple more questions than we had for the last chapter. Too many, not enough, just right?

Any other housekeeping stuff I should be aware of? Let me know!

Comments

[Marla Taviano]

I'm behind! Going to catch up this week!
Totally unrelated question--how do you get books spiral-bound?? Just hand them the book, and they do it for you??

[ginger]

FYI: I like the 3rd (last) bangs alternative best...
And bird of paradise? My kids & I were just talking about those this weekend! They are all over the place down here in FL. I've never thought of them as scary.
My plant story: My grandfather had a column cactus in his greenhouse in MS & whenever we went to visit him we ran to see how tall it was. Never mind all the beautiful award winning roses & camellias that covered his lawn; we had to see something unusual to us I guess! And I never heard him complain.

[Pam Romo]

1. I think that this second principle (that glorifying God is to be our LIFE PURPOSE)creates a paradigm shift that can change perception not just of mentoring, but of everything. I haven't been in the habit of viewing everything in my life in that light. This concept may be something we know, but is it something we live?

2. Susan Hunt creates a picture of Mary for us that shows her to be not merely obedient, but understanding and wise beyond her years, and having great clarity of purpose in her life. I hadn't really thought about her that deeply before.

3. I see myself as someone whose first response is more likely to be emotional, and then eventually I work through things and am more logical.

If we can bear in mind this life-purpose of glorifying God as we go through the various situations that come up every day, I think we can't help but respond less emotionally, more logically, more honorably.

4. I loved the idea that "self-inclination" is what causes us problems, and that when we become absorbed with God's glory, we will be able to interpret our lives according to His truth.

5. If I were to write a phrase from this chapter on my bathroom mirror, it would be "joyful obedience", because sometimes I need to be reminded to be joyful when I'm doing what I should. And I definitely think that response glorifies God.

[Karen]

Spiral binding books.....neat idea. I hadn't thought about doing that with our school books. I do use binders a lot. Sometimes I take school workbooks apart, punch holes in the pages and put them in a binder. I do that for teacher's guides sometimes too. It works really well. For the children's school, you can simply take out whatever pages you need and then put them back when you're done. Wal-Mart has the cheaper binders for under $1 so this is a pretty frugal choice for us. But spiral binder is a neat option too!

[Lisa notes...]

I have posted on my blog the neat things I liked about this chapter, and a story of a young girl at our church that I've seen in a spiritual daughter/mother situation. God has been very good.

http://lisanotes.blogspot.com/2009/09/purpose-of-spiritual-mothering-ch-2.html

Loved the video. :-) You're doing a great job hosting this study, Joanne. I'll be back here tomorrow with more specific answers to these questions. I enjoy reading the comments of all the ladies!

Pam: I like the phrase you chose: "Joyful obedience." I definitely need more of that.

[Tammy]

1. It was a couple years ago when the idea that we are created for God's glory and it is our purpose in life to glorify God, really became part of my life. It has become a constant in my life and is something I strive to do everyday. And I think in a mentoring relationship is one of the first things that should be addressed...does my life glorify God? If not, what do I need to do to change that?

2. Honestly my first thought was to her mother. Did she learn to be obedient and faithful from her mother's example? She responded to the angel's news with such maturity. I just wondered if she was living out the example she had witnessed and learned from her own mother.

3. I probably tend to be more logical...with a little emotional on the side:)

I think if we live like we are the Lord's servant and we live to glorify God in all we do, then we should be prepared to respond to situations that come our way. Does that make it easier to respond to them...not necessarily. Because I think our emotions always have a way of creeping into our decisions.

4. Christ centered confidence is based on truth and self-confidence is based on us. God's truth is flawless and we most certainly are flawed.

5. "Servitude is not easy. Obedience is not a one-time decision. Obedience is a life-time discipline." It reminds me that I can glorify God through my obedience.

[Shayla]

HAHA :D I love this video of you! I am alot like you!!! A little random, but with lots of love and kindness :)

I think if you divide the bangs (like you did at first) but poof them up as well (like you did second) they may look nice, and at least stay out of your eyeballs :)

..I am about to go start writing my post for this!

[Lisa notes...]

1. When I see the purpose of the relationship as something OTHER than the relationship directly, it takes the pressure off. I’m only responsible for doing my part; God is responsible for the results. Whew. He’s good to take that! So, yes, this definition of spiritual mothering DOES affect how I think about it.

2. Mary had SO much on her, yet she stood up to it because she died to self. I want to be more like that.

3. My response is typically scrambled at first. I do better when I’ve had time to think something through. But God doesn’t always give me “time” so he’s telling me to rely on HIM, not my own logic.

4. I really like distinguishing between self-confidence versus confidence in Christ. Again, it takes the pressure off of ourselves, and puts it on Jesus, who is fully capable of handling it. HE is our confidence, thank God!

5. A phrase for the mirror: “Servitude simplifies life.”
I’ve been trying to simplify lately—both physically and spiritually. Remembering that my life IS being a servant to Jesus for the glory of the Father, makes my decisions easier to make.

6. Miscellaneous:
“This book should not be read only from the perspective of your need. Please read it from the perspective of how you can glorify God by enriching the lives of other women as you encourage and equip them to glorify Him.” p 26

“Her purpose was not her convenience but God’s glory.” p 31

[Kristy]

Love the video!

Okay, about the bangs - get a little clip and clip them to one side. It will look so cute on you! Don't poof them!

[Joanne @ The Simple Wife]

Okay, gals, I'm going to respond to those of you who answered here so far because it's just faster!

Pam:

YES, it's something we KNOW, but is it something we LIVE? That indeed is the question. And the question for all of our knowledge of God.

I tend to be very knowledgable (why can't I spell that right?) because I LOVE to study. But am I taking it from my head to my heart to my feet? How I want to live out what I believe!

Tammy:

I find myself wondering more about your story. What was it that made this lesson about living for God's glory really hit home for you and become integrated to your life. I imagine there's more to tell there!

And your comment about Mary's mother is such a reminder to me that my girls are watching!

Lisa:

I'm going to go peek at your blog too, but since you answered here as well...

"Servitude simplifies life." That's definitely one of mine. And the part about Mary's purpose being God's glory rather than her convenience? Talk about some conviction in a statement. Again, yes! I want to live that out!

Kristy and Shayla and Ginger:

Thanks for the bangs advice. Of course you didn't all say the same thing so I'm rotating ideas! :)

Going to start a new comment for my answers!

[Joanne @ The Simple Wife]

My answers...finally! Been having too much fun reading yours!

1. This whole idea of my life-purpose being God's glory is huge for me. I need this tattooed on my forehead!

In everything I do, I want to remember this. I want this to be the lens through which I view everything else. So much of this chapter balances on this for me. It explains Mary's response and paints a picture of what my life could look like--calm and peaceful, even in the midst of crazy circumstances.

The simplicity of it is so appealing. No need to wonder if I'm living up to anything but this. Of course, it's a high thing to reach for, but God is the one who equips us to do it, so really, we can't lose!

It does change the mentoring relationship too--because the focus is not on one woman or the other, on one person's needs versus another's. It's all about God's glory.

2. I think what I was struck by was the control Mary had over her tongue and her words. In light of her circumstances, I'd expect a volume of words from her--and a sequel. Yet she chose her words with such care.

I tend to run my mouth, to speak without thinking, to over-talk everything. "May it be to me as the Lord has said." How I want to have that be the thing that comes out of my mouth in the midst of all kinds of circumstances!

3. This ties into the answer of the previous question. I tend to be emotional, to freak out, to come up with plans A, B, C, and W. Being the Lord's servant--being convinced of my identity as his servant--means my response is obedience without argument.

I think of Westley in The Princess Bride: "As you wish."

And I love the idea that Mary's response was not based on her ability, upon her circumstance but on the character and promises of God. She trusted him--no matter what.

4. I think self-confidence (though the word encourages it) can be off-putting. It's hard to have self-confidence without pride, without boasting, without arrogance. But God-confidence comes with humility and with a focus of God's being the one glorified.

5. My mirror statements? (There's more than one!)

My purpose is not my convenience but God's glory.
Servitude simplifies life.
I am the Lord's servant.

6. I love Psalm 24:3 (p. 35): "Glorify the Lord with me; let us exalt his name together." To me, that sounds like the perfect way to invite someone into this kind of a mentoring relationship. A theme verse for spiritual mothering, if there was one!

[Jamie]

I need to go through and see what everyone else has said, but I just don't have time right now.

Just wanted to let you know that I have posted my answers on my blog...
http://jamespurejoy.blogspot.com/2009/09/spiritual-mothering-chapter-2.html

[ginger]

Posted my answers....
http://nutmeg92.blogspot.com/2009/10/spiritual-mothering-chapter-2.html
Hope to visit some of you ladies tomorrow!

[Helen at A Work of Heart]

Hey Joanne...your video was so fun...great idea.

I hope this is alright...my time limits me to commenting on my "take home" from the chapter.

I must say...I LOVED this chapter...it was incredibly rich to me. I don't think I have ever really related much Mary...of course there is the obvious reasons why not... being the Mother of our Savior but she always seems so removed from me...and I like how that was addressed early in the chapter.

One paragraph that resonated with me was:

"Stables and angelic celebration were not incompatible from God's perspective. Mary could adjust to these extremes in her life because she saw them from the vantage point of obeying God's will, not from the perspective of her expectations or preferences. In defining herself as a servant, Mary had relinquished control to God. Her purpose was not her convenience but God's glory."

I would choose that last sentence above to put on my mirror( which I see I am not alone in choosing :)

OR

"When a woman is absorbed with God's glory, she will interpret her life according to His truth."

I want to be absorbed by God's glory!

So often I look at the reality of what my life looks like compared to what I envisioned it looking like and I can't mesh the two...but seeing it solely for God's glory is quite freeing...and perhaps when we invite others into the stables of our lives instead the palace is where true deep connections are going to be made.

[Ashley]

Because I’m so pickin’ late on the questions this week, I’m going to get these down and then read the brilliance of each of you beautiful handiworks of God after I’m done.
1. I really appreciate this perspective because it is so easy to slightly veer of track on this one. Bit by bit until we are on a completely different road. One with signposts that point to our own impact, our own significance in the life of another and ones that cause us to see our mentoring success or failure in relationship to the behavior/response/growth of the other. This so misses the point, doesn’t it. As I answer, I realize I’m speaking from the position of the mentor, which is where my experience has been. But this is helpful for me when I consider having a mentor in my own life. Not for my own encouragement or growth as ends to themselves. But so that God would be glorified.
2. This really was a fresh perspective on Mary for me, and I loved it. I think what I may have appreciated more than anything else about Mary here was that because she had established in her own mind and heart her identity as the Lord’s servant, her life purpose was clear. She knew God’s protection and grace in her life, and so she could respond to becoming the mother of the Savior (in a most unlikely way) with grace herself, knowing she would be protected in the shadow of His wing.
3. My natural tendency is to respond with intense emotion and then to methodically turn over every rock to discover what is going on and what God wants me to do. I’ve described myself at various points as wearing myself out because I’m constantly feeling and thinking. The weariness for me in this has come to an end when I’ve felt my emotions -- on my own, with my husband and chosen dear friends (or family) -- laid them before God and then asked Him to guide my deliberations and mental processes. He does not ask me to go on a soul-seeking expedition every time something huge happens. Instead, He most often just asks me to trust Him. To spend time with Him in His Word and at His feet, to trust that He is God and that He is Good. In short, to be His Servant.
4. They are vastly different. One sees Christ as the head and my identity originating in Him and continually being rooted in Him. The other looks to self as the place where I’ll find meaning, purpose, identity, whatever. No amount of introspection or getting to know myself (while this is important) can ever offer the final answers on who I am. A daughter of the King. Chosen. Free. A new creature in Him.
5. Having come through an incredibly difficult month with great change, upheaval and emotional extremes, the passage I would choose to (and maybe should) look at every day would be this: “Mary could adjust to these [her son as the King and yet his being born in a stable, etc.] extremes in her life because she saw them from the vantage point of obeying God’s will, not from the perspective of her expectations or preferences. In defining herself as a servant she had relinquished control to God. Her purpose was not her convenience but God’s glory.” (p.31) Maybe too long to put on a mirror but, wow! that is good stuff! I can become so preoccupied with my own pain or struggle that I can miss the point: God’s glory. Hallelujiah!
6. I also love this: “God’s grace enables us to know our mission in life and empowers us to fulfill our mission.” (p.33, emphasis mine) What a relief this is… not by might, not by power, but by the Spirit of God. (Zechariah 4:6) This applies to not only spiritual mentoring, but to all places of our identity, mission and calling. I am so thankful I don’t have to push my way through on my own.
Bless you all this week.

[jenny]

1 The principal of the purpose of life is to Glorify God is know by me but I don't often live it. Which is something I need to do with "joyful obedience" as the author had stated that is how we glorify him.

2. What struck me was the control and obedience Mary showed. She just accepted this as her reason for3. being and went with it.

3.I tend to responded scrambled. I am very emotional in situations and I find my self very impatient. I have a tendancy to want the answer right away and God sometimes has other plans for me. If I live to Glorify God then he will provide and take care of what needs to be done. I need to trust in HIM not my own logic.

4.Christ based confidence is when God is the center of evertyhing we do and we glorify him and Self confidence is arrogance, prideful and all about us.

5. Completing the work He assigns us -Joyful obedience to His will- is the way we Glorify Him. Through obedience we reflect the Glory if the glorious One.

I need to be joyful in all I do b/c this is what God has planned for me. Need to be that obedient servant.

6.

[Aurora @ Under Transformation]

Okay, I'm REALLY late with getting my Chapter 2 notes posted...some traveling and other scheduling craziness has me a bit behind in most things but I'm determined to keep up! Hope to have my chapter 3 notes up later this week. Will be visting other's blogs to see what everyone's learning! Here's the link to my Ch. 2 notes -- http://wp.me/pqFt7-1w -- blessings to all -- and Joanne, thanks again!!

Aurora