Chapter 8 already! I have loved doing this with you and reading your responses. A couple of quick thoughts.
Life is busy. It can be overwhelming. Especially this time of year. And though we get excited about starting something, sometimes it's hard to finish. I so get that. Please don't feel pressured to answer questions, to post something every week.
What's most important is what happens between you and the Lord. What he's teaching you about this topic of spiritual mothering. If you can respond, great. If not, that's okay too. Believe me that I understand when computer time is the thing that has to give from time to time.
That said, I will say if you got the book, keep reading. Finish it...sometime! You'll be blessed and taught and so glad you did. But you pay attention to God's timing and teaching--not mine.
Yes, I am jealous for you to read and love this book as much as I do, but God uses different things in different times in our lives. We may be in the same season, or in a different season. The important thing is that we listen to God's voice in our lives and pursue what he's teaching us in that season.
Okay. Just needed to get that off my chest, to clear that up, to offer some grace, and remove any pressure.
I loved reading your responses to chapter 7. And am always tickled when I see that I underlined the same thing you did. I just want to grab your hands and look you in the eye, and say, "Me too! Me too!"
(And Ashley--I'm just giddy with you. And you can't know how your words about resentment hit me. God's timing is so perfect. Resentment and bitterness were part of the chapter I just did with the group of women at church and it's like God was saying, "I have something to say to you here, Joanne." And then I saw your comment and gulped. In a good way. Just another way God is using you all and other women to teach me. I so appreciate all of you!)
"The Ministry of Encouragement"
1. "As I learned to trust him, I learned to trust others" (page 113). How does growing in trust in God help you trust others? How have you seen the two linked in your own life?
2. "Encouragement is not just an exercise in fluff. The ministry of encouragement is hard work" (page 114). Did this chapter change your definition of encouragement? How are you thinking differently about encouragement after reading this chapter?
3. "Being with a spiritual mother who reflects Christ will encourage and equip a young woman to be like Him" (page 117). We are not mothering other women so they end up like us, but like Jesus. The goal is not a Mini Me! I think of praying that others will not see us, but see Jesus in us.
This means that we can mentor women who are nothing like us; we can ask a woman to be a spiritual mother who is nothing like us. The possibilities just expanded in a huge way! What is important is that we are like Jesus.
Does that change your perception about your ability to be a spiritual mother or a spiritual daughter?
4. Different women reflect Jesus in different ways and have different strengths (and weaknesses!). No one of us will reflect him perfectly--we benefit from multiple spiritual mothers. As you think about the women you know, what are some of the ways you see them reflect Jesus that you want to learn?
5. We've talked a lot about our becoming spiritual mothers in the past chapters. But this chapter has made me realize my own longing for a spiritual mother or two in my everyday, face-to-face life.
How might we benefit from being a spiritual daughter? As we pray to be open to mother a younger woman, let's also pray that God would guide us toward a spiritual mother of our own. If you do not have a mentor/spiritual mother, is there someone you'd like to ask?
6. Anything else you'd like to add?
Joanne, thanks for giving us all the counsel to give ourselves a break if we need it! I've been out of pocket for a few weeks, life has just been too crazy to read or write much. I just posted Ch. 6 answers today!! But I won't let being behind make me think I should give up. I will finish...maybe behind the group but I will finish!
Posted by: Aurora | November 16, 2009 at 10:28 AM
I've put up some notes from chapter 8.
http://lisanotes.blogspot.com/2009/11/encouragement-ministry-ch-8-spiritual.html
Aurora, I agree with you in thanking Joanne for her good counsel. I'm having a hard time squeezing in everything I need to do this week, so some things are just not getting done. But that's okay.
I have to remind myself often that God will give me the right amount of time to do the things that HE wants me to get done. And I don't have to worry about the rest. Easier said than done, but it's a goal.
Posted by: Lisa notes... | November 19, 2009 at 12:16 PM
1. Trust is difficult for me. Always has been. I don't easily confide. I have about 2 people who I would say I trust with being myself and expressing myself to. I know it should be different, but this is an area that I constantly have to work at and seek God's help in.
2. It reminds me that my encouragement comes not only in the form of words, but also in my actions. I'm thinking of the quote you mentioned in the next question. Our lives reflect our relationship with Christ. How we react or how we respond with our actions, matter as much as how we respond with our words.
3. Yes. It makes me feel less like I need to have it all together. I just need to be humble and obedient to God's word and live that out.
4. Genuine compassion, love and concern for others and a strong passion for His word.
5. We're in a position right now where we are going to trasnsition from our current church(where my husband is the senior pastor) to a new ministry. We will be church planting in another state. So right now I'm not sure how this will work. I'm hoping to use what I'm learning from this book and discussion here, to help in the church plant. That maybe this is a specific thing that I can focus on and start in our new ministry. Hopefully somewhere in this transition I can seek out a mentor, I know I need this, and then eventually find someone who I could do the same for. I guess we'll see:)
6. I know I need to work on coming out of my cave.
Posted by: Tammy | November 20, 2009 at 10:20 PM
Ahhh!
I typed a long comment for this post and then something happened and I lost it all and Safari shut down.
I hate it when that happens!
Posted by: Joanne (The Simple Wife) | November 22, 2009 at 07:08 AM
Joanne, I hate when that happens, too. Sorry it happened to you. :-(
I’ve seen evidenced this week that not trusting in God leads to not trusting in others. Unfortunately, a leader in my church micromanages to maintain tight control, and it “appears” to me (I can’t judge his heart) that it’s because he can’t trust God enough to let GOD work through other people as well as himself.
This chapter did make me think more about encouragement as something to be diligent about, not just casually do it when I feel like it. I also liked how it talked about being “with”. That makes it sound more manageable to me, to just be “with” other women and minister to each other as we’re together.
Tammy, it sounds like God is preparing you for a new work. Blessings on you as you prepare yourself to meet the challenge!
Posted by: Lisa notes... | November 22, 2009 at 06:16 PM
Finally posted my thoughts on my blog:
http://jamespurejoy.blogspot.com/2009/11/spiritual-mothering-chapter-8.html
Tammy, how exciting for you!
Joanne, I look forward to hearing what you have to say. Off to read some more!
Posted by: Jamie | November 24, 2009 at 08:35 PM
Hi all, I am way behind, but that’s OK. I’m still reading, and I’m still learning, and I’m still here. So here goes…
1. Because God is perfectly and supremely trustworthy, when I experience that faithfulness in my own life, I am empowered to step out in faith to trust others. And when others disappoint me, I am reminded of my perfectly trustworthy Father, who never lets me down. Likewise, I realize my own limitations… I never do all the good I desire to do. I am not perfect, and knowing God is releases me from the damage I do to myself when I feel inadequate and unworthy because of my lack.
2. After a really difficult experience with an important older woman in my life whose relationship with Jesus is uncertain (in which I shared a painful piece of my life and felt she spoke into that place of fear, rather than speak hope and encouragement) I was so encouraged by reading this chapter. It crystallized what I had experienced and suspected to be true. Hunt says on p. 115 that if we are not moving in the direction of Jesus, “we cannot encourage others. The closer we get to God and the tighter we hold to the hope we have in Him, the more we are able to encourage and equip others to a life of love and good deeds.” And on p. 119, Hunt says this is the very nature of encouragement, as spoken of in Hebrews 10: to “consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” This makes encouragement so much more clear to me.
3. Such a good point, Joanne! I hadn’t thought of it that way before. Now that I do, my perception of having a spiritual mother or daughter is expanded. Hallelujah! God uses in spite of—and even through—our differences. I think this especially frees me as I consider who to ask to spiritually mentor me. I do so often think of the need for similarities (in all kinds of ways) as the criteria for making this decision and inviting this unknown spiritual mother into my life. God is bigger!
4. I want to learn more about selflessness, humility, Godly boundaries, a heart of thankfulness and praise, choosing hope, balancing the pieces of my heart and life, living out my love for my husband, daughters, family, friends, community and world. My goodness, so many things!
5. I am so there with you, Joanne. This chapter really emphasized my longing for a spiritual mother. I have thought of two women in particular and need to continue praying faithfully that God would guide me toward whoever this spiritual mother may be. That I would not put differences or the belief that her life is too full ahead of what God might have me do or ask.
6. I loved the challenge at the bottom of p. 124: “Call an older woman and ask for her advice about something.” Lord, please help me to become more teachable, humble and willing to admit that I am in need. And help me to reach out to the spiritual mothers around me.
Posted by: Ashley | November 28, 2009 at 10:15 PM
Oh dear, I'd forgotten that the computer ate my response to this chapter. Let's see if I can try again and get caught up.
1. I trust God pretty easily. After all, he knows me and loves me and is trustworthy. But I'm seeing that part of trusting him involves trusting others, which comes a bit harder for me.
2. I love that encouragement is a ministry. That it is work. That it matters and has great value. A note in the mail, a text message to say hello--those things may seem small, but they are not!
3. See my comments in the post--yes! This is huge. Spiritual mothering isn't about making others like me--mothering itself isn't about making my own daughters like me. But encouraging them to grow in the image of Christ as he is formed in them.
4. I love the women in my life. Some pray with such passion and confidence. Others value people and are great listeners. Still others are gentle and kind. Others remember what I tell them and follow up. I want to be like them in so many ways!
5. I long for spiritual mother--one up close and in person. Yet I struggle with living somewhere temporarily and not sure how to not be limited by time. I think I just need to go for it!
Posted by: Joanne (The Simple Wife) | December 01, 2009 at 09:12 PM