Intentional friendship

This is my friend Christy. Isn't she beautiful? She makes me smile every time I think about her.

(And yes, I have a tiara on my head made from foil wire stuff and curling ribbon--it was one of the projects for girls at our church's House Party for Grand Opening a few months ago. And I wasn't about to say no to a tiara of any kind! Though I wish I'd taken it off for the picture because I look kind of dorky, but this is the only picture I have of the two of us.)

 

Anyway. 

This is my friend Christy. She is a gift from God, just for me, and I love her dearly. Our friendship is something special, something we are intentional about. This is the friend I meet for coffee every Friday morning at the Starbucks down the street--for at least an hour and a half, and sometimes right up till lunch. 

We drink our lattes (tall nonfat chai for her, tall soy vanilla for me), laugh, cry, pray, and talk about everything under the sun. Somehow our conversations always come full circle and reveal what God is teaching each one of us that week. 

Christy inspires me, encourages me, loves me, prays with me and for me, delights me. And I hope I do the same for her.

Our friendship is something special--because we have been intentional about it. Friendship doesn't just happen. Doesn't grow without some time and effort. We clicked when we first met, but we have chosen to be friends, chosen to make our friendship a priority.

There have been times in my life when I've felt lonely, when I've longed for friends face to face. When I've needed the kind of love and support that comes from a girlfriend. And every time I've found that kind of friendship, it has grown because we've been intentional about it.

Talking on the phone. Meeting for coffee. Doing Bible study. Leading Girl Scouts together. Hanging out in each other's homes. Girl weekends. Taking our afternoon walks together. Meeting for lunch. Girls night in.

Friendship is important. We need each other. We can't just wait for it to happen. We have to make it a priority, give it our time. Too often it feels like we fit friendship in when and where there's room. But I'm not sure that really works. We have to be more intentional for friendship to grow and thrive. It doesn't happen by chance.

What do you and your girlfriends do to make your friendship a priority?

Comments

[angela]

It never ceases to amaze me that when I "need" something, I can find it in a blog post. This was perfect today. My friend and I are meeting for lunch. Having been friends for years, we let life get busy and our friendship became a once/twice a year get together. This year we decided that we are more than once/twice a year friends. We have been intentional about checking in and going for lunch often. I printed your post to take to her today... she must read it too!

[alex]

I love your post and know exactly what you mean. I need to work on my intentional friendships, definitely. I think every woman needs a good friend, or several.

[Holly @ Crownlaiddown]

Wow. What a hard question! So I'll be honest. I have girlfriends--many! And you are one of them, dear Joanne!

But as in our relationship, it's once in awhile, though encouraging and certainly and oasis in the desert for me. But with all the things I am juggling at home, I do not make a lot of time for friends. It's not that I am not prioritizing them in my heart--I certainly do love each one of them and pray for them as often as God bring them to mind. But I do not have the time to spend meeting with them much or talking on the phone much. It's a season, I am hoping! I would dearly love to meet a friend for coffee every Friday. Hee! Even in writing this reply, I have had to stop and re-direct Sydney. Such is the life!

Love you and so glad you have a dear friend like Christy!!

[Holly @ Crownlaiddown]

Hee! Of course I have to edit...
*an* oasis and *brings* them to mind.

Ha! Lord deliver me!

[Blessed]

I am SO glad you have such rich female relationship, Joanne! I have been everwhelmingly blessed too. : )

[Jeanie]

My very best friend and I met through our now 14 year old boys...but when they were 2 years old and in Mom's Day Out. We have been through thyroid cancer (mine), hysterectomy (hers), Mom dying (hers), kids going off to college (mine) and so many other life events. I don't know what I would do if she wasn't walking through my life day to day with me. We started out staying home with our kids and then both worked for a spell but we are both back home now and LOVING it. We have a prayer group together, Bible study together, attend each other's churches, talk MULTIPLE times a day, vacation together, eat lunch together AT LEAST every Wednesday...we just live life together. We pray for each other's husbands and families and are so integrated that it would be hard to split apart now. We love most of the same things. Our husbands are both workaholics so we spend alot of time together and you are right....it is the intentional friendship that makes it work. :)