Meredith writes:
My husband and I were beginning to practice "Sabbath" about the same time that Joanne began practicing that with her family.
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Ceasing on the Sabbath
I don't know why, but I think it's easier to start with the "do nots" when it comes to understanding the Sabbath. Just some weird way I'm wired, I suppose. I want a clear list of what I can't and should do--and that way I can check off all the little boxes and we'll all be just fine.
But the Sabbath isn't really like that, I'm learning. So much of it is about motive. What honors the Sabbath for you may not honor the Sabbath for me. Which means it's something we each have to discover and pray and seek God's guidance in for ourselves.
And isn't that the point, really?
I mentioned Lynne Baab's book,
Keeping the Sabbath, a couple of weeks ago. One of the things I appreciated was questions to help wrestle through what it means to keep the Sabbath for me and my family.
She had something to say that makes sense to me about figuring out the "ceasing" part first:
Remember, we are striving to obey the spirit of the sabbath law. We are not trying to make rules or create new burdens. We are ceasing from some activities to make space for resting in God and enjoying the gifts he's given us.
I need to cease from some things in order to make space for what I will do on the Sabbath. If I add without subtracting first, then it's all too easy to get overwhelmed because the day is just too full. I have to clean house, as it were, before I bring in something new. Otherwise it's just clutter.
Here are just a couple of the questions she asks in her chapter, "A Day Without a 'To Do' List":
What do you need to cease from?
What aspect of your life might be losing its value because of overuse?
Your answers to those questions will probably be different than mine. But as I think about it, I need to cease from work, from chores, from my never-ending to do list. I need to cease from the hustle and bustle of the outside world--shopping, running errands. I need to cease from the noise of everyday life.
The second question is a little harder for me. When I think of overuse, I think of the computer. I love my MacBook, but I spend LOTS of time on it--particularly when I'm in the middle of a writing project. Even just reading blogs, surfing the net, and responding to email takes up big chunks of my day.
I am a reader--and always have been. And when I'm on a reading tear, the world could stop and I wouldn't notice! I do read lots of nonfiction, but when I read for fun, I read for fun. Nothing too heady, nothing on Oprah's book club, just total escape into the world of spies and adventure.
I say a reading tear, because I can easily ignore my family for hours on end and escape to the underwater world of Dirk Pitt and Clive Cussler novels. I overdo it easily.
For my children, overuse makes me think of the television, the computer. It's changing now that school has begun (we do not turn the television on Monday-Thursday), but as I look back on the summer, it seemed that the TV was on and someone was playing on Webkinz or Littlest Pet Shop or American Girl or Build a Bear every moment.
As I've thought about my answers to those questions, a couple of things have come out of it:
- No computer for me or the girls on Sundays.
- No television (with the exception of watching movie as a family) on Sundays.
- No homework for the girls on Sundays.
- No chores on Sundays.
- No shopping or errands on Sundays.
- No fiction for me on Sundays.
- Nothing on Sundays that doesn't include the whole family--that means an automatic "no" to any birthday parties on a Sunday afternoon, Girl Scout activities, or playdates.
That's an awful lot of NO as I look at the list. But the cool thing is that some of it feels like a relief--no grocery shopping, no cleaning the house, no laundry!
But like Baab said in her book, all those "no"s create space for the things we will do on Sundays.
This is getting entirely too long and I have to go take Audrey to her final vision therapy evaluation, so more on the YES stuff soon! You deserve a cookie if you've read through this whole thing--and maybe a cup of tea to go with it. Go treat yourself!
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In the comments section, leave the link to your favorite Simple Wife post. Be sure to include your name, blog (if you have one), and a sentence or two about why the post is meaningful/encouraging to you. The Simple Wife Archives are posted Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings.
Thanks for this reminder post! Our womens's Bible study is working through Mark and just talked about Jesus being Lord of the Sabbath and what that means for families today. I sent the post to our group.
Praying for you today!
Posted by: Caroline Perez | February 04, 2011 at 09:23 AM
I rememeber this post too! Very impactful and relevant. The difficult thing for my family is that my husband is a pastor, so his "sabbath" may not fall on a day that works for our children to have their "sabbath." I completely needed to hear your list of "no's" and was truly motivated by them.
Posted by: Megan | February 04, 2011 at 09:44 AM
I too appreciated this post. I love the freedom that Jesus opens for us in saying He is Lord of the sabbath.
For me Sunday is usually an extended sabbath as I love my daily times of sabbath
as well.
Joanne, what a celebration we will all enjoy as you are able to return to your blog! Praying for you my friend and all of your family. You are loved.
Posted by: Sue Tell | February 04, 2011 at 04:35 PM
I enjoyed reading this topic, along with the others.
I want to add that, I had just grabbed a cookie and made some tea just as I began to read. So your last paragraph made me smile.
Praying!
Posted by: cathy | February 07, 2011 at 07:20 PM