Lazy Weekends (Toben)

We really use our weekends for rest. That means at least half the family stays in their PJs all weekend. There is a reading, snacking, a little homework, a little yard work, and this weekend a very special event: Audrey has decided to clean her room!

For the last month we couldn't see the carpet, but in the scheme of things it just wasn't worth fighting with her about. Then out of the blue this weekend she just decided to clean. She has literally worked for at least 12 hours on her room and it is starting to look good! I am so proud of her, but I am also a little proud of our parenting--instead of fighting with her to clean up we gave her time to figure out for herself that she just can't live with her floor a foot deep in clothes and trash and who knows what else. So far she has removed 5 lawn and leaf bags of trash. I am so excited and proud of her. Now we just have to see if it'll last. But we will take it as a little victory.

We were hoping to get some deck-sitting in yesterday but if it never really warmed up to the point that we could comfortably sit outside. It is really getting nice out in the back yard. THe flowers are  coming up, the trees are leafing nicely and the grass is getting nice and green. I fertilized a few weeks ago and that seems to have given the yard a jump-start. I even had to mow this weekend! So maybe the thermometer will jump enough for us to get out there for some time this afternoon and enjoy the fresh air.

I have a rare opportunity this week to speak at the Nation Day of Prayer luncheon in Colorado Springs. I literally have no idea why they chose me out of all the people they could have asked. I suppose our story is a pretty good one, and I suppose that prayer has been a big part of the last year plus journey. I have my outline together and I am confident that I have something to say. I just hope it is well received. THe last time I spoke in public was to a bunch of middle school students at Denver Christian. They were a great audience!

In fact, I have been asked to be the graduation speaker for the 8th final grade chapel. That is going to be a tough one because I want to inspire the kids and make them laugh and generally not be boring. I am thinking that I will tell them all the things I wish I knew going into high school. Things like, make friends--high school can be pretty lonely and isolating if you don't make an effort to meet people. Or get involved--high school gives you the freedom to try all sorts of stuff from student newspaper to sports to theater to fine arts. Not too many other opportunities like that in life where you can just pick something and give it a go. Fortunately I have a month to come up with this one.

Joanne is hanging in there. She is glued to her Kindle the last couple of days--apparently she is in the middle of a pretty good book. The Kindle has been awesome for her. She has the Fire so she can get on-line with it but still mostly just uses it as a reader.We are still getting a ton of use out of our iPad. We manage all the family's email accounts through that thing and it is the best device I can think of to do that on. It's not quite a laptop replacement for me, but it has become that for Joanne. Remember, that iPad was a generous gift from Joanne's friends and in the early days she used it to communicate. In fact I still have the screen saved where she wrote "popsicles" for the first time, followed closely by the word "orange." You can't imagine how fast I moved to get her orange popsicles. If I remember correctly that was considered contraband in the hospital but we snuck them in much to Joanne's delight.

I guesss that's about it.

Prayer requests:

1. This is a selfish one but I would really prefer not to bomb on Thursday at the NDP luncheon. I hope that I can minister to the folks that are there and that our story/message would be well received.

2. Joanne is still struggling with depression, loss of identity and frustration with her limitations. She needs a "win"--something good to happen for her to lift her spirits.

3. We should find out next week what sort of financial support we will get from Denver Christian that will either allow us to keep the girls there or force us to go to plan B. We literally can't image having them anywhere else so this is a BIG need.

4. Praise!!! Joanne is sleeping better. I think we finally have a combination of meds that are allowing her to get through the night. This is a HUGE deal as she was sleepless for literally a couple of months prior to this new regimen.

Toben

Comments

[Marla Taviano]

Thanks for the update, Toben. Praying for beautiful Joanne and for your upcoming speaking gigs (how exciting!).

When I was a little younger than Audrey, my dad went in my bedroom with a yard rake and raked everything in a huge pile. He gave me a certain amount of time to clean it before he'd throw the whole pile away. From then on, my room was pretty awesome and spotless. :)

[Kimberly]

Thanks for the heads up on room cleaning...we still have littles so we have complete (almost) control on the room. Choosing battle, letting them learn from natural consequences is good...just hard for a parent sometimes.

[Janet Cline]

Thanks, Toben, for the update. Praying for your speaking engagements and also for the kids tuition money for school. Let us know if there is anything we can do. Is there a fund set up at the school where we can donate?

[gamble]

This was really such a nice article. I do really wanted to put more comments in here. Great!

[Amy]

So good to read this update. Lifting you all up for some encouraging wins!

[Linda Hughes]

Toben,
If you speak half as good as you write you will be a HUGE success at the NDP. You writing is heartfelt.
I like your idea, when you speak (to the 8th graders) about encouraging them to get involved, otherwise they might isolate themselves. I think that applies to church too. You get to know a lot more people by getting involved.
Praying for you and your precious family,
Linda from Seattle

[Child of God]

Thanks for updating! You will do just fine with this speaking date.

Continuing to pray for your family.

Blessings,
<><

[Patricia Blomeley-Maddigan]

Hi, Toben -
Your requests are in no way selfish - none of them. You are truly thinking mainly of those around you.
My prayers for you and Joanne and your family will be for all your requests. And I know that God will be with you in all things. As He is now.

Patricia

[Beth P]

This made me smile and reminded me to pray again. The Lord will give you the words! So glad Jo is sleeping well! Everyone feels rotten and down without good sleep. You've also reminded me that a spotless teenager room is not the priority; the relationship is. Like the other poster asked: Is there a fund at DC? Can't believe your yard is just now coming alive. I feel like we've been in summer here in GA for months... Love to Jo!

[alyssa]

I would love to hear you speak, hope we can listen to it or see it. I have only listened to you speak once about something you did Focus on the Family I think, but I remember crying as I heard you narrate Joanne's stroke details.

Speak from the heart Toben, just like you write. You don't sugar coat the hard parts, are honest about your feelings and struggles and you always thank God through adversity. I hope someday Joanne herself will be able to speak about this.

Praying.

[anonymous]

I would like to answer a question from Janet who commented on April 29th regarding contributing to tuition for the girls.
We have been a DC family for years and we also want to help. I spoke with the business office at the school and here is the way to help the Heim family. Once the packet has completed the review process and Toben and Joanne have been notified of what the school can do to help them, we are free to send checks to the school to help reduce the tuition. Checks should be made payable to Denver Christian and mailed to 2135 S. Pearl St. Denver, Colo. 80210. Be sure to mark the memo line "Heim family"
All monies received in their name will go to reduce the tuition for both girls for the 2012-13 school year. These payments are not tax deductible.
Toben, please blog asap when you hear from DC. At that point, we can begin sending our checks!
My family will match the first $1,000 given in their name!
May we love one another as our Lord first loved us.

[Linda Hughes]

Toben,
I really enjoy my iphone app "Jesus Calling", it is so encouraging. I would like to gift it to Joanne if she would like it, but i need her e-mail to do it. It's a daily 365 day devotional for her iphone-ipad.
The Lord will bring to mind the exact words to speak @NDP.
God's Blessings,
Linda

[Stephanie]

Praying, always. For all of you.

[Lora Osburn]

God, In YOU, we firmly believe,
Toben's words today, let them be received. Amen

[Rayleine Chagoya]

God be with you, through Christ we can do all things, I will be praying for all of you. Love from So Cali

[Karen Booker Schelhaas]

Sure hope your speech went well, Toben -- and know that I've been praying for Joanne's sleep and a "win" to lift her spirits. I get that. Praying!