Joanne Heim

Independent living

It's hard to believe that it's been four months since I moved into my new home! I moved in on May 15 and felt pretty settled with the first couple of weeks.  Mom and Dad worked really hard to make that happen, arranging furniture and hanging things on the walls. I think part of growing up in the military and moving a lot is learning to get settled very quickly. The key is to set up your bed first so you have a place to sleep. Next comes the kitchen--gotta have the coffee maker ready to go for your first morning in your new house. A place to sit in the living room is important too, along with clothes in the closet and food in the fridge. My kitchen table was too small for my dining room, but worked for a couple of weeks until we managed to get to IKEA for the one I wanted. Mom and Dad spent long days here working super hard and I made lunches for us on the patio and kept the freezer stocked with popsicles. By the time they went back to Denver for the summer in early June, I was fully moved in and feeling very much at home. I did post house pictures on Facebook as I got settled, so if we're not friends there, send me a request and a note so I know that you're a blog reader.

I do have a short list of house things for Dad when they get back to Arizona in about a month, but everything has gone really well this summer. (I often tell people that I don't have a "Honey-Do" list since I don't have a honey. Instead, I keep an ongoing "Daddy-do" list at his request!)

I really love my home and my neighborhood and have enjoyed getting to know my neighbors. My little neighborhood is very social--we have happy hour on Thursday afternoons at our community pool which is just out my back door, as well as monthly dinners out at local restaurants. We have an active social committee that plans parties and events and it's been fun to get to know some of the women on the committee better since I joined the group last month.

I am still volunteer at the library in Surprise twice a week, something  I thoroughly enjoy. I am still loving my church here (and still attend my Denver church online each week too). Women's Bible study started this past week. We are studying Matthew and I am looking forward to a great year of study with friends on Tuesday mornings.

I really like living on my own and rarely feel lonely. All the same, I am very excited to bring my new kitten home next week. Again, there are pictures of him on Facebook and will be many more once he's home with me!

I am anxious for Mom and Dad to get back. A neighbor asked if I need their help everyday to manage living on my own. My answer was that our family  really likes each other and that I just miss them when they're gone! After they get back, our yearly beach camping trip is coming up.

So lots to look forward to--new kitten adoption and a friend coming for a short visit next week, Mom and Dad returning in a month and then a trip to the beach! 

Super big Thursday

Today is a pretty big day. The camper is parked out front and we will be packing it full of everything we need for a month before leaving tomorrow for the Pacific Northwest. We will stop in Billings tomorrow night and spend the weekend in Spokane (so excited to visit my college campus for the first time since graduation!) before almost a week in Seattle, visiting friends and family. Up to Olympic National Forest and then down the coast in Washington and Oregon. We plan to make it to the Redwoods in Northern California before turning left and coming home near the end of September.It's a good thing we like each other a bunch!

It's a big trip and we're excited. I'll be posting on Facebook along the way, but probably won't blog too much...

The other big thing today is taking my test to get an instruction permit for behind-the-wheel driver training! After tons of back and forth with the DMV, my paperwork is finally in order!

I also have an appointment to hit the treadmill this afternoon for an hour or so. With all that to be done, I'd better go eat some breakfast.

 

Have a great Thursday, y'all!

 

Mother's Day update

(Wednesday afternoon)

Thank you for all of your kind comments and encouraging words on my last post about marking mother's day in a new way for this new season in which I am now living. I read and treasured each one. Thank you.

A few of you have asked how the day went, so I wanted to post a quick update while it is still fresh and before we head to Utah  on Friday.

I slept well on Saturday night and woke up excited for the day on Sunday morning. I told God first thing (and every time I sort of woke up in the night) that I really hadn't a clue about how to order the day, but that it was his to do with as he pleased. A good start.

I skipped my morning mocha and had some hot tea and sat at the table with Mom and Dad while they ate breakfast. After a shower (the very best part of the morning!), Mom and Dad left for church and I got comfy on the couch with my Bible, the journals I keep for the kids, a good pen--Bic crystal, naturally!--and my Maddie-dog.

I talked to God for a while while Maddie listened attentively. (I pray out loud when I'm alone and I also talk to Maddie a lot, so she doesn't always know the difference!) I prayed for everything I could think of---end of the year stuff at school, graduation, friendships, health, future plans, safety, their relationships with God. Mostly I prayed for God's will to be done in their lives. For them to remember all they were taught and know about him and to love him and seek him.

I read the journals I have kept over the years and remembered so many wonderful memories. And I wrote each of them a long letter, pouring out my heart and all I was feeling on that day.

I read a bunch of psalms, did my Sunday school lesson, reviewed the first week of the Psalm 23 study I will be teaching again this summer, and prayed a bunch more. 

I drank many more mugs of hot tea, turned on the fire, and loved on Maddie.

I ignored my hunger, tried not to think about the cookies in the pantry, and prayed for each of my Sunday school kids.

I asked God to show me how to be a mom in this season how to love my kids well from a physical and emotional distance, and thanked him for all of the good times and years I had with them. 

Mom and Dad came home from church after running some errands and I spent some time just resting on my bed and hoping to nap (I am a TERRIBLE napper, no matter how tired I am or how hard I try to fall asleep.) I sat outside with Mom while she planted some red geraniums in pots for the front patio; I sniff and sniffed the air since a neighbor was barbecuing hamburgers outside and  IT SMELLED SO GOOD!

I made a scrambled egg on toast for dinner and it was almost the yummiest thing I've ever eaten.

All in all, it was a great day and left me with a sense of peace and calm and contentment that has remained with me  all week.

I  love you all very much!

Joanne

 

Marking Mother's Day

(Saturday afternoon)

Mother's Day is hard for me. Two years ago was as bad as it gets since it was my first one not being with my children. I had just moved in with Mom and Dad and spent the day feeling sad and sorry for myself and doing the ugly cry for most of the day. Last year, I endured and survived. 

Up until a few days ago, I had planned to do the endurance and survival thing again, but I have a new plan now. 

I've been thinking and praying about how best to mark  (it's not really about celebrating anymore) days like Mother's Day and the kids' birthdays since we are not spending them together and doing nothing just feels like faking i or ignoring it. Endurance works to a certain extent, but it's a grit-my-teeth-and-get-through-it-while-watching-the-clock kind of a thing, so I've been praying about a way to mark these kinds of days in a better fashion. 

I pray a lot in the shower--it's a time each morning when I lay it all out before God, giving him the pieces of my day and my heart and stepping back to let him arrange it all as he will.

The other morning, I feel like he picked them all up and laid them into  place in a new pattern for me to pursue.

It felt specifically like a way to mark their birthdays at first, but then he said,  "Why wait until August? Why don't you start on Mother's Day and get a jump on it now?" So here goes.

I will be staying home from church tomorrow to spend the day alone with God in a day of fasting and praying for my kids. No food, no electronics-- just me and him, a lot of water, my Bible and the journals I started for each of the the kids when they were babies. Journals in which I've written them letters on birthdays, first days of school, really good days and really hard days too.

So I will pray and read and write... 

...and I'll probably cry some too, which will be good even though I'd rather not. The drugs I was on for so many years shut down my emotions for the most part, but I've been weaned off almost all of them since moving  in with Mom and Dad. My anti-depressant has been the last one to go, but as of this week, I'm down to only a quarter  of the dose I've been on for years! With that decrease, my emotions should start to return to be a bit more normal. (I have been happy and even sad, but tears have been really rare, and we all need some here and there, so this feels like a good thing to me.

In other news you may have seen on Facebook, we took our newish camper out for a couple of days last week to try it all out--it is great! And we are heading to Utah at the end of the week to go to Moab for a week or more. The weather there is in the 80s these days, so I am ready for that for sure! In late August, we will be taking a longer trip to the Pacific Northwest and down the Oregon coast, which should be great fun. We will stop in Spokane on the way to Seattle, and I'm excited to visit Whitworth.  I haven't been back since the summer after graduation, and I'm ready to see how much the university has changed!

My neurologist recommended me for driving evaluation and training, so I hope to be driving later this summer early fall too!

I am going to teach Bible study for six weeks this summer for our church. Mom and I will host it here and I'll be teaching the Psalm 23 study I wrote and taught for Mission Community Church in 2010 in Arizona. I am excited about it,  but a little bit nervous too. I'm certainly not the same girl I was then, but God reminded me this morning that he IS exactly the  same God and since he'll be doing the heavy lifting on it, it will all be okay!

That's all the biggest news here...

I hope you are doing well and the flowers are blooming in your neck of the woods!(It's rained here a lot today and our tulips are red and the golf course out back is super green!)

With love to you, my friends,

Joanne

Vacation recap

This is at least the third time I have sat down and started to write this post about our trip to San Diego. Somehow, I have felt a bit overwhelmed as I face the keyboard with lots to say and only one hand to type it all. I know I can do it, but the time it takes feels daunting when I remember days of typing both quickly and accurately with two hands. I am going to persevere this morning and get this done while it is all still relatively fresh in my memory and before I forget too much.

The house is quiet, Maddie is sleeping on the red rug in the kitchen at my feet and I am warm and comfortable, so here goes!

What a marvelous trip we had!

Getting on the plane in Denver to fly to San Diego gave me a bit of a pause. I used my wheelchair up to the plane door (DIA is a really big airport), where the crew gate checked it for me, and walked onto the plane. I got a little nervous before takeoff and felt sorta claustrophobic--the Frontier plane seemedsmaller and more cramped than I remember planes being the last time I flew more than six years ago. But I breathed deeply and remembered those everlasting arms holding up the plane and made it through the flight just fine.

We landed in San Diego, got our bags and Dad found the rental car and picked us up at the curb. We headed straight to El Indio for carne asada burritos  (a Heim family tradition when visiting San Diego by plane) before heading north to Leucadia. We arrived at our rental cottage, got unpacked, and went straight to bed.

The cottage was as cute as could be and over the week, I mentally moved in, remodeled  the bathroom, repainted and redecorated, and created an entire fantasy life of living there someday! Unfortunately, my fantasy requires some time travel so I can do that as the pre-stroke me--running on the beach every morning and driving a cute convertible  are big  parts of my fantasy! Nevertheless, it was fun to dream and shop for fantasy furnishings for the rooms in the cottage  for my charming patio. The fairy lights are staying on the patio, but I am adding some fountains and maybe a hot tub as well as some citrus trees in big pots.

We spent a lot of time watching the surf, ate at  favorite restaurants, and saw a lot of friends. The weather was beautiful, clear and sunny. We went sailing in San Diego Bay, spent a day at Sea World, drove up to Newport for lunch at the Crab Cooker with my dearest friend Christy, wandered the shops in Encinitas, and enjoyed being a family. I posted pictures on Facebook and Twitter as the week went along.

A lot has changed in the years since I lived there from 2003-2006, but enough was the same that it felt like going back home.

Along with seeing friends, walking on the beach was definitely a highlight! There were times when I wasn't sure I'd walk alone again--let alone on the beach, so I found  much to be grateful for and prayed many prayers of thanksgiving! It wasn't quite warm enough to walk barefoot, so I guess we'll have to go back when it is!The flight back to Denver was easier than the flight there.It didn't feel quite so new and unfamiliar to me.

Coming home is always wonderful--even if we are getting a snow storm in the next couple of days. I will be still and remember the feel of the sun on my face and the sound of the surf and stay inside as much as possible!

Have a great weekend, y'all!

 

Joanne

 

It is a BIG day!

Tuesday afternoon, 12:45 p.m.

As I posted on Facebook earlier this morning, today is a big day.

I made two big goals for 2016--to fly on a plane (I have not flown since my stroke and it has been almost six years since my last flight from Phoenix to Denver when my youngest nephew was born.) I do not like to fly. My dad is an aerospace engineer and has explained many times how a plane flies. I could explain it too. My head understands it perfectly, but my heart freaks out.My other big goal is to get my driver's license, which will be a summer project, for sure.

Today is a big day because Mom, Dad and I are packed for eight days and leaving for the airport in about an hour to fly to San Diego this evening! We are staying in Leucadia, just minutes from where I used to live. in an area that feels very much like home.

Maddie is already settled in at my sister's house, ensconced with her cousins. She will be super spoiled and tired and sleep a bunch and will probably get a weekend in Winter Park, to boot. I hate leaving her behind and am already looking forward to an terrific night's snuggle when we get home next Thursday!

I am much more excited about being there and seeing friends and going to Sea World than I am about the actual flying part of the trip!

But I will remind myself of the ocean up the hill from where we are staying in Leucadia and Mexican food at Juanita's and Especial Norte  and favorite places from when I lived there in 2003-2006 (coffee at Pannikin for sure!) and it will be fine! Plus, " underneath are the everlasting arms" that hold up the plane better than physics. It says so in Deuteronomy somewhere...

I decided just 17 minutes ago to take my laptop along, so I do hope to blog at least once and will, of course, post a bunch on Twitter and Facebook as always.

As for Colorado: Snow away and be as cold as you like. I don't care...I will be at the beach!And, yes, I will wave at the ocean for you--and at any dolphins I see... (fingers crossed!)

Much love to all,

Joanne

Happy New Year!

Sunday evening, 7:30 p.m.

Happy New Year, y'all!

I hope you have had a marvelous Christmas break and are ready to jump back into the routine of life this week.

Our Christmas was lovely, quiet, and very cold. (It was just on Saturday that we finally made it above freezing here in Denver and the mid-50s this afternoon felt like a heat wave!) Today was the first morning I have not been miserably cold in church in weeks. It was great to be a comfortable temperature and really focus on the service instead of dwelling on how cold I was.

We celebrated Christmas on Christmas Eve this year. We went to my sister's house just after noon and ate a big meal together before opening presents with them. Wade deep-fried another turkey, which was just as delicious as our Thanksgiving bird. We exchanged gifts with their family before going to a candle-light service at their church at 4:30. After that, we headed across town lickety-split to get to our church for a service at 7.It was a wonderful, long day.

On Christmas morning, Mom, Dad and I exchanged our gifts around the tree before getting dressed and going next door for brunch with neighbors who have become good friends. We spent the days following Christmas mostly at home, trying to stay warm.

It was been great to have so many empty days in a row.

We jump right back into our usual life tomorrow with my art group at the Stroke Center and then a trip to Colorado Springs to meet with my counselor for my usual Monday afternoon appointment.

Mom and I start Priscilla Shirer's new study on the Armor of God next Thursday (1/14)at Cherry Creek Presbyterian Church and the Old Testament prophets study we did last fall with women from our own church resumes the Saturday after that.

It feels like there ids more I have to tell you, but I planned to blog earlier this afternoon until my sister and my niece came over to watch Harry Potter. We have been watching the film's as Ava finishes the books and watched part 1 of the Deathly Hallows this afternoon.

If I could type faster, it wouldn't be a problem, but it is dark and that means my body is ready for sleep. Maddie is up already here on the bed asleep and she is asking me to stop typing and come snuggle.She is the queen, so good night for now and I will get back to you soon! As always, I post frequently in between blog posts on Twitter (@joanneheim) and on Facebook (Joanne Heim).

Much love and sweet dreams, 

Joanne

Holding down the fort again

Mom and Dad left super early this morning and are headed to California for the week--a getaway for just the two of them. Maddie and I are staying here and keeping each other company. Someone is coming every morning to walk Miss Maddie and to provide any assistance I need (which is not very much these days!) As I've shared before, Mom and Dad have gone away in the past, but they've only been a couple of hours away by car. This feels like a much bigger deal since they are flying and are much farther away.

I got up after they left for the airport and have found sticky notes around the house that Mom left for me--on my mirror, the shower door, the kitchen cabinet and Maddie's food container. Love my mother!

I am super excited for them. They are renting a car and driving up the coast as far as Big Sur and Carmel, which is one of my favorite places ever. I  kinda wish I were going along because of that, but I wasn't invited and I really am thrilled for them to get away on their own!

I have a week full of my usual activities and am going to the Stroke Center for my art group this morning. I missed it last week due to an appointment with my neurologist, so I am excited to see my friends there and to paint today. My appointment was my usual six-month check with her and everything is fine. She is a wonderful person and my favorite doctor. I always leave her office feeling encouraged and hopeful.

We had a mellow weekend around here. Dad is rebuilding our deck so he worked on that a bunch. We went out for pizza on Saturday night since we don't really do Halloween. There are no children in our neighborhood, so we didn't deprive anyone of candy by not being home. And the only candy we tend to have around is a box or two of Milk Duds for emergency movie snacks for me. I don't really share those if I can help it! They are my favorite!

That is about it for news here.

Last week, I did meet with the counselor the kids have been seeing from time to time. We had a good chat and I think we may have helped each other understand some things a little more clearly. There are no plans for me and the kids to meet together at this point in time. Toben does send me updates a couple of times a month and it sounds like they are both doing well. They are doing well in school and really getting along well --I am really proud of them for that and am glad they have each other!

My tummy is starting to rumble, so I think it is time  to finish my coffee and think about food. As it gets cooler, I have switched to oatmeal for breakfast every day. I do love my Captain Crunch when the weather is nicer, but I need something hot when it is cold outside!

Happy Monday to all. I hope you have a great week!

 

Joanne

Living single

I have had some big news in process that I did not want to announce until it was complete. After a year of being separated and in the limbo of being married but not living together and lots of prayer and godly counsel from people I greatly respect, I filed for divorce this past April. It was a difficult decision to make and one I made slowly and cautiously.

 Since we married when I was only 18 years old, I have never really been a single adult until now. I found out a few weeks ago that the divorce is final and so it is time to let you all know and to move forward  with  my life and my continued recovery as a single  person. I am keeping my name the same because of my publishing profile and the assistance programs in which I am already enrolled or in the process of enrolling.

Toben did not contest the divorce and we are both moving forward without exchanging money or possessions. That makes it simple and pretty straightforward.

The girls are going to stay with Toben and live in Colorado Springs. They have friends and school there, so it makes the most sense. And because I live in a 55+ community with Mom and Dad, children must be 18 in order to be residents.At this point in time, the girls are too young to live here.

 

 

It looks like the girls and I may be doing some counseling together in the future and Toben and I will develop a much more detailed parenting plan as part of that process with the counselor in Colorado Springs my attorney recommended. Please pray for this whole process. Thank you!

 

Joanne 

 

Naturally, I am disappointed and sad that this is happening. Even though divorce was my decision, it is certainly not something I planned for or dreamed of for my life.

 

I do know that God is still writing the story of my life and while I do not know what upcoming chapters hold, I am certain the story will end well. God is good like that, you know…

Maddie

Maddie is my dog. She is atwenty-pound, nine-year-old Cavapoo (King Charles Cavalier Spaniel/poodle mix) and practically perfect in every way (just like Mary Poppins!)

We first met Maddie before we moved into the neighborhood last Spring. Driving in one day to check on house progress (Mom and Dad totally remodeled our house after they bought it)we saw a man walking the cutest dog. We pulled over, unrolled the window and asked if we could meet his dog. Bill said yes and we met Bill and Maddie for the first time. As we got to know Bill better, we offered to dogsit if he ever needed someone to watch Maddie. She came to visit for a week here and there, weekends every now and then, and the occasional Saturday when Bill had plans to be gone all day.

I fell in love with her and hated to give her back when Bill came to pick her up. This went on most of the autumn of 2014 until Christmas day when I received a card from Maddie, asking if she could live with me for always. I called Bill and talked to him for a bit, and said, YES! (of douse!) Maddie came over the week after Christmas and has been mine ever since. She is queen of the house, very spoiled, a total love. She brings me great joy every day and cuddles each night. In short, she is a wonderful gift!

And like all gifts from God, she is a gift that gets better when shared. My sister's kids adore her and she loves them right back.

###

When I was in the hospital for all those many months after my stroke, animal visits were too few and far between. When animals did visit, it made my day and all the other patients' days too.In therapy group at Spalding, everyone always said more animal visits were needed...

So I have this great and loving dog who loves people and is small enough to get on a hospital bed to love someone and be loved and petted and adored. How to share the gift of Maddie? Hospital visits, of course!

She and I went to Spalding  Rehabilitation hospital about a month ago and met with the volunteer coordinator.She had her picture taken for her volunteer badge while I went through a quick training.

Yesterday afternoon we went back for our first afternoon of patient visits. We started with my old room (236) and worked our way down the hall, visiting people and hearing a bit of their stories. Maddie was beyond wonderful and behaved as if she were born and trained to be a therapy dog! We saw a couple of my nurses and my speech therapist, plus the woman who used to  be the cook and took such great care of everyone by making delicious meals and knowing all the patients by name.

It was good to go back and walk through the doors feeling healthy and strong and to remember the progress I have made. 

I talked with patients about hard work, perseverance, and hope. The afternoon was super rewarding and we will definitely be going back regularly as the calendar allows. I got my picture taken too so I will have a badge like Maddie does.

###

So what gifts has God given you that you could share with others?

In other news, well, there's not really much other news, so have a great weekend!

 

Surgery in the morning...

Tuesday night, 7:30 p.m.

Mom and Dad got home from Vail earlier this afternoon; they had a terrific time away and Mom even slept past seven both mornings--a direct result of your prayers--so thank you so much!Your support means a bunch to me and I appreciate you more than I can say.

Maddie and I did fine being here and holding down the fort. Neighbors checked up on us and so did my awesome sister... We watched movies, sat in the sun on the deck, and kept each other company. I went to the Stroke Center for art yesterday and PT this morning--which is my usual schedule for the week.

And after help with my unmentionables from the senior care home health worker we hired after my shower this morning, I got dressed on my own! shorts and a tank--nothing too hard--but I DID IT! Shoes and socks too.

Wegrabbed a quick dinner out at Pei Wei after Mom and Dad unloaded the car, and now we are all doing our own thing until bedtime.

Tomorrow morning, I am having minor foot surgery to fix a couple of things that cause me daily pain.

Because of my stroke, my muscles are tight and my left toes curl under painfully, making me walk on the knuckl. I am getting a tendon release on my second toe, which should prevent it from curling under and help it lie flat in my foot and ankle brace inside my shoe. I am also having part if my big toenail removed, since it has been chronically ingrown for months,which does not feel very good at all.

I will be in a walking boot for at least a week and showering with my foot in a plastic bag until the stitches come out after a week or so.

I won't have full anesthesia--just a few novacaine shots in my foot, which is supposed to be the only thing I will feel. I hope that is true, because thinking about the whole process  makes my tummy feel funny.

 I am so glad I won't have to be in a cast so I can continue walking. To go back to a wheelchair now would feel like going backward at this point for sure.

Happy (almost) Wednesday to all! Time to put on jammies and brush my teeth...

Love,

Joanne

Holding down the fort

Mom and Dad just drove out of the garage and are headed to Vail for a couple of nights away from home. I am so excited for the two of them to get away together with some friends for a few days.

They are meeting my counselor and her husband up there and staying at a super swanky place that I wouldn't mind going to for a night or a week, even. They will eat out, wander Vail village shops and restaurants and have conversations that aren't about me. I think they really need the time away together and I hope they have a blast, sleep great, and and come home on Tuesday afternoon rested and refreshed.

Maddie and I are holding down the fort here. I am excited to take this big step of independence! My phone is programmed for all of the neighbors on our street, the church directory is handy and my sister is only phone call and a few minutes away.

Tomorrow and Tuesday morning, a home health caregiver is coming over to be here while I shower and to help me dress, walk Maddie, and see me off on the bus that will take me to my usual activities at the Stroke Center.

Tonight, a friend is coming over to eat dinner, watch a movie and eat lots of theater candy!

I will get myself and Maddie fed and to bed each day, so life should go pretty smoothly. I will keep my phone close just in case and will be extra careful around the house.

Will you please pray? Especially for my sweet mama to really rest and relax and not worry about me...

Thanks so much!

And get a load of this one-handed typing!! Not very quick...but I got it done in the end with some corrections here and there!

Much love,

Joanne

Overdue

Just like Kate, I have been past due--not for a baby, thank goodness!--but for a blog post.  And since Kate delivered her baby yesterday, I'd better get busy too.

What used to be such a simple task has become so much more difficult for me.  And I miss it so much.  I hate that I've neglected something so good for me and that always brought such joy.

Anyhow...

We are back in Colorado after a lovely and WARM March in Arizona.

I've been cold ever since.  But with my electric blanket and my Maddie-girl to snuggle, I have yet to turn into a popsicle!

It is good to be back home and back into our normal and busy schedule.

We hope summer will bring some emptier days that require brainstorming at the breakfast table to fill, but until then, there are appointments, activities at the Stroke Center and errands to run in between...

I did qualify for bus service with Access-a-Ride, which is part of Denver's RTD service.  I am taking the bus to and from my activities at the Stroke Center on Mondays and Tuesdays each week.

The bus comes to the end of our driveway and then takes me right to where I need to go.  The drivers are kind and helpful and walk me to the door to make sure I arrive safely.  It gives Mom and Dad a break from chauffeuring and I've met some interesting people.  

The independence is good for me  and only requires a simple phone call to their reservation line to schedule my trips each week.  

In other news, I am joining our church after attending for the past year and teaching Sunday school with Dad.  We are now teaching the middle school class and enjoy our time on Sundays with a group of great kids.

Physical therapy is super hard work, but I am seeing progress and have even begun to leave my cane at home on a regular basis!  It feels good to have better balance and some ability to get around more easily - even if Tuesday's PT class keeps me sore through Friday each week!I am also doing lite gait therapy on Saturdays. It is a pretty cool treadmill that I couldn't fall off, no matter how hard I tried. You can google "litegait" to see pictures of it, if you really want to see it for yourself.

Dad is now unwired from his broken jaw in Arizona and is now eating with a fork instead of a straw and is able to talk more easily too.

Mom and I are thrilled for him and are quick to tell everyone that he never once complained during his six weeks of being completely wired shut.  He is amazing!  I'm sure I would have done nothing but complain...

We don'yt have any big summer plans except to be home and to be warm and to spend some time at the pool each day.  I can hardly wait!

Counseling is going well and I am becoming more and more independent and confident, all while hearing God tell me that dependence and neediness are good things.  I, of course, struggle with that balance as I long to become independent and more self-sufficient in daily life.

It's hard to believe that I have been living in Denver with my parents for a year now, but it really has been that long.  I have not seen my girls during this year and I miss them each day and pray for them constantly.  I have heard from Toben that they are doing well and I imagine they are excited for summer vacation and for school to be out.

Wishing you all a happy spring filled with blooming flowers and warm sunshine.

With love,

Joanne

P.S.  Maybe independence is really about living in dependence rather than being totally self-sufficient.  Hmmm...  Independence by living in dependence. Something to ponder...

J.

Snowbirding with the Apostle Paul

I'm sitting in my pajamas and slippers in my room, looking out the window at the snow.

There are about 5-8 inches outside, and 4-7 more expected overnight.

I used to think that I loved winter.  I was wrong.

I LOVE being warm!

Winter after  stroke makes getting around harder than ever, makes muscles ache more,and makes total inactivity indoors super appealing.

When Dad and I were teaching Acts to our middle school class at church, I noticed a verse I'd not noticed before:  Acts 27:12. On the journey to Rome, Paul's ship stopped on Crete.  Just as winter began, Luke wrote:

"Since the harbor was unsuitable to winter in, the majority decided to sail on, hoping to reach Phoenix and winter there."

Instantly, I drew a smiley face in the margin and a quick doodle of a camping trailer to mark its spot.

So in light of Scripture and my lost love of winter, I will be applying Acts 27:12 as close to literally as possible:

"Since the weather in Denver is unsuitable to winter in, Dad, Mom, and I decided to move not...to reach Casa Grande,(between Phoenix and Tucson), and winter there."

We aren't sure what the weather will do this week, but our goal is to pack up the fifth wheel and hit the road on Thursday, arriving in the warm sunshine on Sunday, March 1.

There we will spend the month, reading, playing Bingo and shuffleboard and horse shoes and lawn-bowling--all while not shivering. I am also going to teach myself calligraphy.

Maddie-dog is, of course, coming with us and ready to make new friends while we are there. She alone will miss the snow--it fills her with glee and energy, causing her to revert to puppyhood and go completely nuts when she is out in it. 

I will do my best to keep in touch--always on Twitter and Facebook and here too, provided I can get the dictation mic to work again.  It's not cooperating today, so I am scribbling away on paper and will ask Mom or Dad to type this up in a bit.

Joanne

(and Mom's typing fingers [thanks, Mom!])

Rewind and fast forward, an update on all kinds of things...

Even though Thanksgiving is in the past, it is still very much on my mind as I continue to consciously remember all I am thankful for.

 Being thankful is something I try to cultivate each and every day. Before I get out of bed in the morning, I stop to remember all I have for which I am grateful. For the past few weeks and on Thanksgiving especially I have been particularly thankful to be alive. Along with that, I am thankful that I am glad to be alive and that I no longer wish I were not.

Praise God, The darkdark days of depression are mostly in the past. Like everyone, I still have those days when I feel sad and melancholy, but for the most part, my days are good and my outlook  is positive.

 Some of that may be that all of my medication is stablized. I have been weaned from most all of the heavy narcotics that caused side effects of fatigue and depression. At this point, the only prescription medications I take are for depression, pain, and seizure prevention. I do take a couple of over-the-counter medication according to my doctor's orders. These are minor, things like aspirin and medicine to prevent heartburn and stomach upset that can happen because of all the other medication I have taken in the past several years.

 It feels great to live life clearly and without the fog caused by so many of my previous medications.

 I am also very thankful for the Rocky Mountain Stroke Center; it is located not too far from our home, and is the place where I attend art and craft groups as well as where I do physical therapy with my physical therapist and a small group of other people who have had strokes and, as a result, have many of the same physical limitations I have.

 We do a lot of stretching and core strengthening exercises in a group and also work individually or one-on-one with atherapist on things like balance, stability, and specific muscle strengthening. I spend a lot of my time in physical therapy working on balance and transferring my weight evenly from my right leg to my left one. My balance is improving quite a bit and while I am at home, I walk without my cane for the most part. I do use my cane outdoors and when we are away from home. Being able to walk without my cane at home frees  my  right hand from holding the cane to be able to carry things. This means I can carry my Kindle to another room and read by the fire. I am also able to walk around my bed in order to make it, though the bed fairy still comes by each morning to smooth out any wrinkles I may have missed. After I get up, I can now walk to the kitchen and pour my own coffee and even carry it back to my room! Having more freedom and independence to move around the house feels good. It allows me to do more for myself, and thatmeans that I don't have to ask Mom and Dad to wait on me quite so much. Showering is another thing I'm doing more independently, though Mom hrlps dry my back where I can't quite reach. A big goal of mine is to learn to dress myself. Undressing is easy as pie and quick too, but managing sleeves and multiplelayers with only one working arm is a work in slow progress...One-handed shoe tying is something I dohave down pa--if my shoes are specially laced. Doing my own hair and makeup is not too hard. As always,  using the bathroom independently  and alone is near the top of my thankful list. I dont miss those re-potty training hospital days at all! Sorry if thats TMI...;).I alwaysdo want to be honest with you!

 Since Thanksgiving, we have attended of number of holiday programs and concerts. I have checked in and documented each of them on Facebook.

 My favorite program so far was definitely the performance of Messiah at Village Seven Presbyterian Church in Colorado Springs. The choir and full orchestra presented the entire work and its quality was simply incredible! That church performs Messiah every other year and I cannot recommend it highly enough. It is well worth the drive from Denver and if you live in anywhere near the area, you should definitely go in 2016 when they next offer the program! We will be there andI am already looking forward to it!

 My second favorite program was the Home for the Holidays show at the Lone Tree Arts Center this past Saturday. The talent represented was phenomenal. Unfortunately, this is the last year this show will be offered. I am disappointed that we will not get to see it next year....:(

 One of the featured dancers in the show on Saturday reminded me so much of Audrey, and I have been missing her badly ever since! I wanted to find the dancer after the performance just to hug on her, but I didn't see her nearby. I'm sure she's glad that I missed her because she would have been sure I was a crazy stalker weirdo! ;)

 Naturally, I am missing the girls as Christmas approaches. At this point, there are no plans to get together over Christmas or New Year's. So many of you have asked me at one time or another if I get to spend time with them. I do not. And I have not seen them since April. I do think of and pray for them each day, and long to see how much Audrey and  Emma have grown up and changed in the past nine months...

Tomorrow we will attend the Christmas Eve service at my sister's church to see her children in their Christmas program. We will all have dinner at her in-law's home before Mom, Dad and I go to a Christmas Carol sing-along at a church here in town.

 We will be athome for Christmas morning; two of our neighbors who are both widows will come for Christmas  brunch midmorning, and later in the afternoon, we will head over to Kristen's house for dinner and to exchange gifts there.

 We are planning to attend our neighborhood New Year's Eve party at the clubhouse; the party uses East Coast time to celebrate, so we should be able to stay awakeuntil "midnight" and be home in time to get to bed well before the actual Colorado midnight!

 In January,  my regular schedule of activities at the stroke center and counseling each week in Colorado Springs will resume and Mom and I will begin the spring semester of Bible study at Cherry Creek Presbyterian church, where we attended Bible study this past fall.

 The day after Thanksgiving we decided that getting away from the cold and snow in March would be a good idea so we will be relocating to Arizona for the month of March. We are staying at an RV park in Casa Grande (south of Phoenix) with some friends who go there every year. It will be quite a drive on Sundays, but we will be able to attend my church in Gilbert. I am excited to have the opportunity to reconnect with dearfriends there, whom I only see on Facebook these days...

 I am also excited to play horseshoes, shuffleboard, and bocce ball.and to hang out by the pool, of course!I have completely adjusted to life  in a retirement community and I love it!I still dont know how to play bridge, but there's time! The other big plan in the spring sometime will be to visit Oklahoma and pick up my new puppy from the breeder when she is born. We are not sure of the exact timing since her mother is not yet pregnant. She is a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel and poodle mix--a Cavapoo, just like our favorite neighborhood dog, Maddie, whom we frequently dogsit and love like crazy!

I am super excited to get a puppy and to train her to be my very own snuggle buddy and friend!

Have a very Merry Christmas!

With great love,

Joanne

 

Life in CO Springs by Emma

Hey guys I haven't done a post in a long time and I wanted to tell you about my life in CO Springs.

I absolutly love Eagleview!!!! It rocks. I have made many new friends, my teachers are so nice. This quarter I'm in photography and drama, super fun, and pre algebra 7 and accelerated LA.

I get to see my sweet little kitty 2 times a week, she is doing great. Can't wait for spring, still can't beleive that we got 4 inches of snow on may day. 

 

CO Springs is awesome, i love living near my grandparents.

 punpkin:)

 

Emma

my new project/spring is here

hi this is emma,

i want to show you my new project, the other day i got some Play-Doh this is some of what i made so for:

spring is here, the other day I went on a walk and there are so many signs of spring outside!!!!!!!!!!!

thanks for reading this                 

 

p.s. this is the first blog i have ever written

I Still need my mommy!

 Here's one yhing I've learned in the pat four--fOUR! months of this season of stroke and recovery: (CRAZY THAT IT'S BEEN THAT LONG--SO GLAD TO BE GOING HOME ON FRIDAY THIS WEEK!!I still need my mommy! i may be nearing 40 and be a mommy myselfm but at heart I'm stilljust a girl who needs her mama everyday for life to be okay.

so thanks, dearmom, for bring at the hospital with me everyday, for shavong my legs, forreading to me, for painting mty nails, for keeping company, for warding off loneliness, for puttin g your life  on hold for four months because you love me. Iloveyou.and I want to be the kind of mommy you are when i grow uupbecause you are the best there is. Hands down-- no    competitionompetition!

Popcorn showdown

My brother-in-law makes the best popcorn ever. Really. Every bit as good as the movies. And actually even better, because you actually know what's in it.

I love having movie night at their house. Not just because their television is bigger than my king-sized bed, not just because I get to snuggle with a baby, laugh with my niece and nephew, or hang out with my super-cool sister. Yep, those are all good.

But the popcorn? Well, wow.

I've thought that Wade possessed some magical popcorn-making skills, some super-secret pop secret, perhaps a spiritual gift for things kernel.

Until now. Under the tree for me was this:

The Whirly-Pop. The secret of popcorn prowess and perfection.

Now? My popcorn is every bit as good as his. But perhaps we need a showdown to double check. I'll take any excuse to pop some more.

You can get one here.

Click Class

So my fabulous sister is a totally fabulous photographer and she's hosting a Click Class at her home here in Denver on April 16. It's a class designed to teach everyday photographers how to really use their cameras and get the most out of them.

Sounds ideal for us bloggy gals, huh?

All the information can be found here. And I'll be there all day too--doing the cooking, helping with favors and decorations and such. And picking up some photography skills on the side.

Wanna come?

Breathe, Joanne, it's a new day

Yesterday was one of those days when I'd have had my parenting license revoked if I didn't turn it in voluntarily--if there was such a thing required. Which might not be a bad idea. At least then there'd be a manual, and perhaps an instructor, and maybe even a test to pass before being declared qualified.

'Cause I'm clearly not.

Ever have those days? The kind where you think, I have absolutely NO idea what I'm doing!

Yep, me too.

And it was yesterday. Oy. Was it ever.

But I think we may have actually had a breakthrough late last night before bed. We may be on the same page. We may have a clue what each other is actually thinking and feeling. We may be at a turning point. We may break some bad patterns and move onto breaking some new ground rather than wanting to break something over each other's heads.

Just maybe.

I'm so glad that God made day and night, that we get to go to bed at the end of a horrible-no good-very bad day and then wake up fresh to a brand new day with no mistakes in it yet, as Anne would say.

And I'm glad that we cleared the air and apologized to each other and forgave each other before the day was done. Cause it was ugly, ya'll.

(Something tells me that parenting is as much about my being disciplined as it is about my training my girls. Maybe even more so. 'Cause, wow, does it bring to the surface the things in me that need to change. Whoa, Nellie.)

And I'm glad that Toben came home last night (well, early this morning) from his trip to Tennessee and that I don't have to be a single mom today. Somehow dads are able to be more objective. Their buttons don't get pushed nearly as easily as mine. Somehow Toben can parent without turning into a twelve-year-old. Sometimes I can too. But sometimes not.

All that to say to myself: Hang in there. Take a deep breath. Surrender. Listen. Pay attention to what God is up to. Don't rush ahead. Follow his leading. Bite your tongue. Pray constantly. Ask for help. 

And you hang in there too.

'Cause I'm guessing that I'm not the only one to have days like yesterday, days when a girl just wants to throw in the parenting towel and run away.

Half my life ago

December 27, 1991

19 years old

Happy 19th Anniversary to us!

Underneath my tree

This is what I found under the tree this morning when I peeked in the window seat. Emma and Pumpkin having a snuggle and looking out at the fairy dusting of snow from last night.

The forecast says more snow tonight and tomorrow. Christmas vacation has officially begun and our fingers are crossed!

Pretty pictures

Just a quick heads-up: My lovely and talented little sis is back in the blogging world. Her blog from their year in New York has been officially retired and she's up and running now here. 

You'll find samples of her work and links to her official website and a way to contact her for photos. If you live in Colorado and need pictures, you'll definitely want to call her!

(Oh, and Gina? Your pictures turned out great. And I love your yellow shoes. A lot.)

Shopping prayer

Audrey and I headed to Target yesterday afternoon (ended up going after all, Holly!) on a mission: To find a cute holiday outfit for her. One she loved, one I liked, one that would be appropriate for some holiday things.

Sounds impossible, right?

But we're going to hear The Messiah at Village Seven Presbyterian Church (the church I grew up in) in Colorado Springs on Sunday with my parents. And Mom is taking us all out for a girls' lunch at the Broadmoor the week after Christmas.

Holiday things for which jeans and a hoodie are most definitely not appropriate. So an outfit is a NECESSITY. (Things in capital letters automatically make it into the budget. Like GROCERIES. And HEAT. And a HOLIDAY OUTFIT FOR AUDREY.)

My sweet Audrey is a jeans and hoodie and Uggs girl at heart. Unless it's a sweats and hoodie and Uggs day. Which is usually fine. With school at home and attending a super casual church, she doesn't really need dressy clothes, and doesn't really have anywhere to wear them if she did have any.

Off to Target we went, praying all the way. Because--if you have an almost-teenage daughter yourself--you know that mother-daughter shopping has the potential to be either WONDERFUL or HORRIBLE. One or the other. There is no in between.

So we prayed. Earnestly. For a good outfit that she would feel great in, that would be her. (No Santa dresses for her.) For fun and laughter and joy in looking and trying on. For love to prevail.

We loaded up the cart with anything and everything that caught our eye--some things she liked that I didn't, some things I liked that she didn't, some things that we both agreed on. To try it all and see.

An hour and a half later, we found something we are both so excited about. Something that looks great on her. That she feels great in. That's versatile. And is just so darn cute. And warm. (Really, why so many sleeveless holiday clothes? Yes, they are cute, but winter is typically COLD!)

I'll post pictures when she debuts the whole thing.

(And while I'm asking questions, why the six item limit in the dressing room? To find a good outfit, you need to mix and match and put all kinds of things together. Shoes alone ended up being two of our items. In and out and back and forth to the cart, swapping out items for different ones is part of why it took so long to try everything on.)

We prayed after our trip to Target too. Because while the cute outfit is wonderful, the fact that we had a ball together feels pretty miraculous. THANK YOU, LORD!

(And for those of you following me on Twitter, I bought a slip. Which means that not only will my tights stop sticking to my skirt, I can wear a clingy dress that was already hanging in my closet on Sunday that just needed some, well, foundation underneath.)

Sweet potato pie recap, Memory Monday, Christmas is coming!!

So I made sweet potato pie this year for the first time ever. Yummers. Seriously. It's very much like pumpkin (so if you don't like pumpkin pie, don't bother making this), but lighter and fluffier and--hey, it's still a vegetable--so it doesn't count as dessert and you can have pecan pie too. Which I also made but with 3+ cups of pecans rather than the 1 cup the recipe called for. Because, c'mon--it's PECAN pie. Let's load 'em in there.

We spent Thanksgiving with my parents (my sister was with her hubby's side of the family) and the day was quiet and lovely. I am very, very thankful for my parents, so spending Thanksgiving with them is a joy.

I totally lucked out on my parents. (Okay, I know it's not luck!) They are wonderful and everything parents should be. And while you're wondering, we definitely had some rocky times, but we're all good now.

Please, please don't think I'm bragging. Because I know so many people who don't have the kind of relationship with their parents I have with mine. Every time I think about them, my breath is sort of taken away with the blessing of it. They are a gift from God--one I don't take for granted.

And if you know them and need some parent-like people in your life, I am totally willing to share. It was a hard lesson for me to learn, but I finally got it. With some struggle. But when I say I'm willing to share, I mean it. Gladly.

Because all gifts that God gives us are meant to be shared--and are usually better somehow when we do. Time, talents, skills--not to mention our finances. Giving and sharing our blessings is a good way to ensure that they last.

***

Up next? Memory Monday. We're adding the next section to Philippians 2:5-11, which I'm happy about. Because I love the part about "every knee will bow in heaven and on earth and under the earth and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father."

Whew. That always makes me feel sorta goosebump-y. 

What are you learning this week? If you need an idea for December, one year I learned Mary's Song from Luke. It's a good one.

***

Okay, what else? Christmas is up. The tree is now officially a Christmas Tree rather than a Thanksgiving Tree. I'll post some pictures and such soon, but this is getting kinda long.

Hope your Monday has been great. I love you all dearly--you are a blessing to me and I thank God for you whether I know you by name or not, you can bet he does. And is delighted with you. Enthralled with your beauty, actually, according to Psalm 45.

Don't doubt it. Just accept it and rejoice...

Let's take a walk

I love taking family walks. Somehow it always makes me think of Sunday afternoons when we lived in England. Church clothes and heels? No worries. Walk anyway.

Emma and I took an autumn walk last weekend through our neighborhood and ended up discovering new trails and leaf canopies and all sorts of lovely autumn-ness.

See?

(That's my new-to-me Betsy Johnson fur coat from the world's best thrift store.)

"Fall is my favorite of all the seasons," says Emma. Me too.

Happy fall!

 

P.S. This is post number 1,500! Pretty cool.

Monday stuff

Happy Monday bloggy peeps!

I can't tell you how much nicer Mondays are without laundry and housecleaning in them. I'm so loving coming into the weekend and Monday mornings with everything in order. 

We had a great weekend around here--lots of resting, lots of documentaries on Netflix, lots of crocheting.

Not to mention a fabulous leaf-hunting walk with Emma on Saturday afternoon. We explored some new paths in the neighborhood and delighted in the season. "I love fall, Mom," she said. "It's my favorite." Me too.

(I do have some pictures, but they're on the camera in the other room and I'm happily ensconced in my chair by the fire.)

Oh! And it RAINED last night. Enough to hear it on the roof. Which I totally love a whole bunch.

So...

1. We studied Antarctica in geography last week and watched this from Netlflix last night all snuggled in bed. Wow. WOW. It's only 40 minutes long, but it was amazing. Incredible.

I tell you what...that's perseverance. Endurance. Courage. Leadership.

2. Netflix also has a bunch of National Geographic stuff on instant watch these days. I highly recommend these:

  

I think I may have discovered a new favorite film genre. 

3. While watching all these, I crocheted away. I'm making this out of some gray alpaca wool in my stash. I hope I have enough yarn--it's going to be close.

The free pattern is here, though you do have to start a free membership to access it.

4. We had friends for dinner on Saturday night--two couples and their two kids each. Twelve of us in all. Emma and I made an apple pie and a cherry pie for dessert. And while I am super loyal to apple pie, the cherry was so super yummy that I'll be making another. Soon. Really soon.

5. I caved and turned on the heat on Saturday morning. It hasn't run much, but it's on. I love the smell the first time you turn on the heat in the fall.

6. Greek midterm tomorrow night. Flashcards are my best friend.

So, what's up with you?

***

Oh, and we'll be adding verses 11 and 12 to Psalm 91 this week for Memory Monday.

Monday mishmash

I must admit my first thoughts this morning were not very nice. How in the world did it get to be Monday again so quickly? Time flies, it's true, but does it have to go at the speed of light? Wouldn't a nice leisurely pace be nicer?

It makes me think that if time is going to continue at the zooming pace of the last couple of weeks that I'd better be doing everything I can to live in the moment and choose to enjoy it. Because in a blink it's past.

Am I living in the moment, or just biding time? Or worse, wasting time? Questions I need to ponder, I think. Because every time I turn around another week has gone by. And I don't want to look back on it with regret. "I wish I would have..." just isn't going to cut it.

That said, this morning I'm beginning again...again. I haven't been quite right lately. I've been surprised at some anger that has flared up unexpectedly, been feeling like my heart has been getting comfortable with being hard in places, been unresponsive to some promptings of the Spirit.

But as I was reminded yesterday when we visited a church with some friends and the pastor preached through all of Romans 8, "I am not controlled by the sinful nature, but by the Spirit" (Romans 8:9). And that happens as I choose to set my mind on things of the Spirit. If I'm going to be lazy about that, then no wonder things haven't been quite right.

So. Monday morning. Time for a fresh start.

***Pause to have a meeting with Toben. Cry some. Run four miles. Hear TobyMac's "Hold On" for the first time and feel like it was just for me. Eat a breakfast burrito. Start school with the girls. Break for lunch and quiet time.***

It's now hours later than when I began this post and I have to say I'm feeling worn out, tired, hopeful, anxious. A mishmash of feelings to go with the mishmash of everything else. Somehow a fresh start can feel intimidating as well as exciting.

The girls and I are going to head up the hill and pick some apples. One of the neighbors has an apple tree and a sign that says to help ourselves. So that's what we're going to do just as soon as my mom gets her groceries put away and comes over.

But before I forget, here's what we're learning this week for Memory Monday--adding verses 5 and 6 to what we've learned so far in Psalm 91.

What are you learning this week? 

And also before I forget, here are the lyrics to that TobyMac song:

Hold On

Wake up to the morning light
wipe away the lonely nights
let a brand new day wash over you,
Wanna see you smile again
show some love to your crazy friends
wipe your tears away
those days are through

If you move just a little bit closer you can put your head on my shoulder
Yeah, yeah

Chorus: So baby hold on
just another day or two
I can see the clouds are
moving faster now
and the sun is breaking through
If you can hold on, to the one that's holding you
there is nothing that can
stop this crazy love
from breaking through

We're breaking through
We're breaking through

Wake up to the morning sun
thank the Lord for the
things He's done
lift your eyes up to the
hope that's ever true
Wanna see you smiling girl
you're a light in this jaded world
wipe away those tears
this one's for you

Come on, move a little bit closer, you can put your head on my shoulder
Yeah, yeah

Chorus

And the stars are up there
shining for you
oh, the Father does adore you
His love will never change
And you and I 
we were born to follow
the hope that will lead us to tomorrow 
and no one can take it away

So baby hold on
just another day or two
I can see the clouds are
moving faster now
and the sun is breaking through
If you could hold on
to the one that's holding you
there is nothing that can stop this crazy, crazy love from breaking x2

You see the clouds are
moving faster now
the clouds are moving faster

You see the clouds are
moving faster now
And the sun is breaking through

We're breaking through

***

"Oh, the Father does adore you." Maybe you need to hear that today as much as I did. 

 

The big 4-0 (and the 40th birthday rap)

 

Today is Toben's 40th birthday. We had all the family over last night for chicken spaghetti (from the Pioneer Woman--let's just say that a double recipe made waaaaay more than enough for 12 people. We'll be eating it forever!), Caesar salad, and yummy bread. Not to mention lemon cake with strawberries and vanilla ice cream.

The clouds came over and it cooled down last night, so we ate outside, laughing and visiting. Lovely. I do think summer birthdays are the best when you live someplace with winter. (Have to say that having winter birthdays in Arizona was kind of nice.)

There's just enough cake leftover for Toben to have birthday cake for breakfast. Which is the best reason I know to have the party the day before your actual birthday.

I tried to get a picture of Toben blowing out his candles, but he was way too super speedy.

 

Toben and I were talking the other morning and wondering how come 40 doesn't feel older. Somehow when we first started dating (he was 17, I was 16) it seemed so far away, and somehow like we'd be different people when we finally got here. 

(Though I'm not quite here yet, despite the fact that my dad always wants me to be a year older than I am. Which is fine, I suppose, because the girls always say I'm a year younger than I am. So it all comes out even!)

But, honestly, I think we both still feel about 17. With some aches and pains for sure (my back has been kind of twinge-y the past few days--I'm debating going for a walk this morning instead of a run), but really, I thought we'd somehow feel different at this milestone, more mature, more grown up.

But we don't. Wonder what our teenage selves would've thought to to know that adults pretty much feel the same on the inside as they do.

So I guess age is more of an attitude after all!

The girls performed a 40th birthday rap for Toben yesterday. Thought for sure you'd want to see it!

Word.

(BTW, I will post the chicken pot pie recipe this week and get my Memory Monday post done today. Hang tight.)

The joy of cooking

When we got married, we registered for pots and pans. Boring, shiny pots and pans--just like everyone else's. And while I've wanted new ones over the past almost 19 years, I don't really need new ones. Mine still work fine and look like new.

But a day or two after we moved back to Denver, my mom called and asked if I wanted some she wasn't using anymore. My grandmother's Magnalite.

I said "YES!" before she was even done asking.

 

I love that I've eaten countless meals prepared by my grandmother in these--even if what was cooked in them was occasionally lima beans or butter beans or black eyed peas. (My grandmother lived in the South, and though it's my heritage, I just can't do them kind of beans. YUCK!)

Knowing they were hers makes me smile every time I use them. Somehow the food just tastes better when there's a history to go with them.

And I will say, the big dutch oven worked perfectly for the delicious chicken pot pie Audrey made for dinner last night.

 

 

 

8-9-10, 11-12

Happy birthday, my sweet Audrey girl! I just finished writing you a nice long letter in the Letters to Audrey journal (from last night: "You're going to write in it tomorrow since it's my birthday, right Mom?"), telling you all kinds of things about my hopes and dreams for you this next year, what I love about you, and such. 

I have no idea if you've read any of the letters already in there. They are written to you, so it's fine if you have, though I have this idea of giving you the book when you graduate from high school, or maybe when you get married, or maybe someday when you have a baby.

(Okay, that's weird. And now I feel a little freaked out. Let's get back to you being 12, which suddenly doesn't seem so old after thinking about you being 25.)

Anyway, pretty cool that your birthday all lines up today, huh? 8.9.10 and you're not 11 but 12!

(Why won't my picture flip? I've tried flipping it every way I know how!)  

I love you!
 

Cousins

Here's a peek at yesterday when my niece and nephews came to play...

We spread out the big blanket under a tree and hauled up the big box of Barbies.

 

Audrey and Levi looked at the light coming through the trees...

 

...while Emma...

...and Ava dressed all of the Barbies for a fashion show.

 

Tyson was a good sport and played with Vet Barbie's dogs.

While I thought, This is some kind of wonderful.

Unplanned

I had thought I'd head to Costco yesterday morning, but then my sister and her kids stopped by on their way home from Doctor Dan's. Poor baby Levi had to have two shots and was not very happy. Which meant that his Jo Jo needed to hold him a lot.

(My niece and nephew call me Jo Jo. Toben has been Bo Bo ever since Ava learned to talk. Yes, we sound like a clown act at the circus, but we couldn't be happier about it!)

No trip to Costco. (Oh, and Kristen took some pictures of the house--I'll post them when she gets them to me.) But that's okay, because we decided to go after dinner and since we were there and very berry sundaes are so cheap and yummy, we called Mom and Dad and they met us. So we sat in the food court (which was empty--Monday nights are awesome for shopping at Costco without waiting in line!) and talked for a while.

As we drove out of the parking lot and waved goodbye to Mom and Dad when they turned left and we turned right to go home (we live about seven minutes away from each other!), I felt so content and happy. My day didn't go according to the plan I made when the day started. But it was so much better. I love that unexpected time with family happened not once, but twice! Such a gift.

 

(Photo by Kristen. If you live in the Denver area and want family/kid/wedding photos, let me know and I'll get you her contact information!)

I'm getting family time today too. Kristen has a photo shoot this morning, so Ava, Tyson, and Levi are coming to Jo Jo's to play with their cousins. Toben put up the swings yesterday, so I think we'll be outside a bunch.

It used to be that a deviation from the plan would send me into a bit of a tizzy, but I'm not the same girl I used to be. Slowly, s l o w l y, I am being transformed. Which is another gift and so encouraging to me.

I read this just now during my quiet time and it did something tangible, amazing, comforting to my heart because it was such a direct response to some things I'd just journaled that I'll share more about soon:

I will not leave you until I have done what I promised you. Genesis 28:15

God keeps his promises. Always. And in keeping them, he is near.

Rocky Mountain High

We are back from camping (loved all your must-have camping item comments, by the way!) and Toben and Emma have washed the car inside and out, I'm on the second load of laundry, and I took a really, really, really long shower.

And suddenly I feel tired.

Think I'll lay down on the couch with some cookbooks and plan menus for next week and maybe rest my eyes for a minute or seven. (Toben is convinced I cannot "nap" for more than seven minutes, and he's pretty much right. Somehow I just don't have the napping gene. The falling asleep early gene? Got that one in spades.)

Anyway, just wanted to pop in and say hi and I missed you and am excited to get pictures transferred to my computer to show you. In the meantime, here's the view from my chair under the trees, just down the hill from our campsite where I had my quiet time.

As you can probably imagine, I did a lot of just being still and knowing he is God.

 

So, what have you been up to this past week?

Going camping

Going to pack up this morning and head to Rocky Mountain National Park for a week of camping. In a tent, even. (Of course, we'll be right next door to my parents who have a fifth-wheel with every modern convenience--fireplace, fridge, shower, electricity!)

I am so excited.

I loved camping as a kid. Then hated it as a teen. And am now prepared to love it again. There's going to be a whole huge bunch of us over the weekend and into early next week, but then it'll just be our family and my parents until next weekend.

I am excited to hike. To sit by the campfire. To roast marshmallows. To paint. To read under the trees. To see elk. To help the girls complete their Junior Ranger books. To hear the wind in the pines. To snuggle in a sleeping bag. To eat Uncle Brett's breakfast burritos. To have my quiet time outside in the woods. To knit. To play cards. To read aloud. To be together. To drink mocha. To eat Gran cookies. To laugh.

There are a few camping trips that stand out in my memory, ones that are clearly focused in my mind. The sounds, smells, adventures. In fact, we watched slides of one of them the other night in Mom and Dad's basement while it rained outside, changing our Fourth of July at the park plans. 

Remembering how cold the mountain stream was, how cool the raft that Dad roped together for us was, how much we felt like Tom and Huck as we poled around the lagoon that was huge in my memory, but surprisingly small on the projector screen.

Laughing at the pictures of my dad and the dog in the tub, covered in tomato juice. Somehow Obie got sprayed by a skunk more than once--and only ever right before a trip. 

I'm hoping that this trip will be one of those trips for the girls. And for the rest of us too. But especially for them. The kind of memory that never fades, the trip that all others measure against in the future. The kind that begins with, "Do you remember that camping trip when..."

So now that I've made a bunch of headbands (short hair is NOT ideal for camping in my mind--missing my long pigtails), packed up the watercolors and pencils, yarn and books, I need to gather sleeping bags and pillows, pack my clothes and a few bandanas and a baseball hat for good measure, and get my day going.

Not to mention getting another cup of coffee. Happy weekend, everyone!

***

What's the one thing you never camp without? 

Going camping

I grew up camping in a green army tent. Campfires, sleeping bags, hearts, rummy, hot mocha, sing-alongs, Boggle, hot dog soup, swing in the tree, and a hammock for reading. I loved it.

In England, we had a little camper to travel through Europe. Still sleeping bags, hearts, rummy, hot mocha, pancakes. And a flush toilet. (Never underestimate it's importance.)

Then we came back to the States and back to the green army tent. Didn't like it so much as a teenager. I was more concerned with not having a blow dryer than having fun. Sorry for the bad attitudes you had to put up with, Mom and Dad. 

We haven't camped much as a family, though we do own a tent and sleeping bags. But that's going to change. My parents camp a lot (if you can call their fifth-wheel with lazy boy recliners and a fireplace and granite countertops camping!) and we're going with. In July. To Rocky Mountain National Park. For a week.

I am so excited.

I want our girls to have camping memories. To love the smell of a pine forest in the early morning, sitting around a campfire at night, swinging in the hammock, and just being quiet to listen to the wind in the treetops.

And I love that we can go with my parents and have a comfy spot to get out of the rain and a flush toilet and hot water and a plug for the flat iron. (Because that's important too!)

I'll bring cards, Boggle, Farkle, and the mocha mix. And some watercolor pencils, sketch books, a knitting project, a book or ten, and some Girl Scout songs to sing.

Oh, I'm a happy little camper, 
Happy camper's what I am.
Oh, I go hiking in the mud and rain, 
Splashing in puddles all along the way!
And everyday is an adventure In how to live in the outdoors. 

Oh, Mother Nature really rocks!
Little happy camper's what I am, 
Little happy camper's what I am! 

2-3-4
Tell us all a little more!
5-6-7-8 
Camping's fun, camping's great! 

Oh, I'm a happy little camper,
Happy camper's what I am!
My sleeping bag's become a home for squirrels,
Oh, how it tickles when the swish their bushy tails!
I love to sing around the campfire,
Making firends and eating s'mores. 

Let's hear it for the great outdoors! 
Little happy campers what I am,
Little happy camper's what I am!

Memory Monday: Psalm 23:1-4 and a little update

First, Memory Monday. As a Bible study group, we're up to verse 4 in Psalm 23. I'm using the Scripture Typer over there on the sidebar and loving it. One thing I like? It makes you learn the punctuation too. Weird, but true. I love a good semi-colon!

I can hardly believe there are only two more weeks of this study. God has been so amazing throughout it all. It's been hard, but GOOD. I have learned so much in the midst of writing and teaching and doing the homework myself. 

It's still a little weird to be doing one week's homework, preparing for the next week's lesson, and writing the homework for still a week ahead of that. Sometimes I'm just not sure where I am! But I am loving it.

God's Word is timely. He is never caught off guard, taken by surprise, or left scrambling. He works EVERYTHING together just so. He is good. And he just keeps getting bigger and bigger to me. 

I think I mentioned that I love to feel small. It makes me feel safe and secure. So for him to get bigger means I get smaller and more and more secure. After teaching last Thursday morning, my darling friend told me she had to tell me something. I could tell it would make me cry from the way she said it. And I was already on the brink of tears, having felt like I made it through teaching without crying--just barely.

She leaned in close and said, "You looked small up there today." That's when I lost it. But not in a bad way. Sometimes the truth is that the ugly cry is beautiful.

The girls and I peeled out of the parking lot on Thursday and headed for the airport. We flew to Denver to see my newest nephew, baby Levi. It was a whirlwind trip and we were back in Arizona by bedtime on Saturday. 

 

(If you're in Denver, know that I wanted to see you, but the timing just didn't work. I needed to sit and hold a baby for a day and a half. To talk with my mom and sister. To watch my girls play with their cousins. We'll be back in Denver this summer for a longer visit--definitely a coffee date then!)

Not sure what this week holds. More Bible study writing and preparation. School with the girls. Work with Toben. I'm not sure how much I'll be around here/Twitter/Facebook/my Google reader inbox. 

We're in a hard place in some ways right now, and in the midst of doing what needs to be done, God is teaching me to wait. To be still. To listen hard. To surrender. To trust.

It takes a lot of energy to be still.

***

So, what's up with you?

Audrey's word from God

 

Audrey heard from God this past weekend at Living Proof Live in Tucson. I didn't doubt she would, but you can bet I prayed through the whole thing for her to know it when she heard it!

Have to say that one of the first things Beth said on Friday night was that each one there was called by God to be there, and that God had something specific to say to each and every one of us. I totally elbowed Audrey at that point!

And this is it. What she heard just for her. It's pinned to her bulletin board along with her event bracelet that she finally took off.

(And as much as the editor and teacher in me wants to fix her typo, I love that it's there. God speaks to us even if we don't always spell correctly! Even if we're not quite grown up. There's no age or height requirement to hear from him. All it takes is the desire to hear him and a heart to listen.)

As we talked on the drive home, we thought about what that means in her life. About her areas of influence. About how we have seen this truth confirmed in her life. She gets that this is part of her calling.

And she's 11. That blows me away. How amazing is that?!

She heard from God. She knows it was him. And you can bet she's listening for him to speak again. Because once you hear his voice, you can't wait to hear it again.

 

Pink hair and Beth Moore

So along with letting Audrey dye her hair pink, the other thing that is making her feel totally grown up these days is getting to attend her first ever Living Proof Live event with Beth Moore this weekend.

 

Audrey and Emma are totally familiar with Beth--they've heard me talk about her for years, have come to Bible study and watched the videos with me when Toben's been out of town and I've been babysitter-less. I copy the listening guide and they fill in all their blanks along with everyone else. They call her Mrs. Moore.

(Audrey sent Mrs. Moore a letter last week, telling her that she'd be the girl with the pink hair up as close to the front as she could get!)

The girls have asked over the years when they can come with me. Pretty much every time I've ever attended an event, they ask when they can come too. It just hasn't been the right time--until now.

There are so many things Audrey could do to show she's growing up, to feel like she's growing up. Things she could do, say, wear, read, listen to. That one of the things that's making her feel the most grown up is to go listen and learn more about Jesus? To go see what it looks like to be a woman who follows after God? Blows me away and makes my heart pound. How good is God?!

I can't tell you how excited I am to hop in the car with my girl later today and go see Beth. I always love listening to Beth teach, and I'm super duper excited to watch Audrey as she sits under Mrs. Moore's teaching.

(Note to self: Pack camera!)

As Audrey's asked about what to expect, one thing I mentioned in passing is that God will have a word just for her. And a word just for me. And that part of what we'll do this weekend is to listen for it. 

That idea has stuck with her. And every day as she prays, she's thanking God in advance that he'll have a word just for her. And he will. I'm certain of it. Because that's just how he is. And she will know it when she hears it because she's prepared to hear it and she's expectant.

Do you expect to hear from God? What might happen if we approached every study, every Sunday, every single day expecting to hear a word from God just for us?

10 reasons why I let my daughter have pink hair

1. She's asked for pink hair on and off for a couple of years now--it wasn't a momentary whim.

But it was against school rules to have a non-natural hair color, so we never dyed it. And let's be honest, that magenta is NOT natural! Since she's homeschooled, we're not breaking any rules. If she were in school, she wouldn't have pink hair. 

(That's why she has no Facebook account even though she wants one. She's not old enough and we will not let her lie about her birthday to get one.)

2. She's 11 and wanting to experiment with finding her own style. In light of some of the hoochy-mama and immodest clothes that are out there, pink hair seems relatively minor to me.

3. It's semi-permanent and will fade over time. It won't last forever!

4. I dyed it for her, so the whole process cost less than a new outfit. 

5. It looks really cute on her! Have to say, her blue eyes really pop with hot pink hair.

6. She wanted it for herself. 

Not because her friends were doing it, not because a boy said it would be cool (not that she cares about boys at all at this point!), not because she's seen anyone else with pink hair. 

We had some good conversations while I sectioned and colored all that hair (she has a LOT of hair). The truth is, if she were doing it for those reasons, I would not have let her do it. And she gets that.

7. Her daddy said yes. If he'd said no, her hair wouldn't be pink.

8. She's seeing that changing how she looks doesn't change who she is. 

Pink hair is fun, but she's still herself and still needs to make wise choices every single day about who she will be and how she will act.

9. She didn't whine and complain and nag about it. She gave us time to think about it, and I really think she'd have been okay if we'd said no.

10. In light of 1-9, why not?

 

 

I am a cool mom

 

Just ask Audrey!

Listening to my kids pray

We headed to church today at noon for a prayer walk around campus before the grand opening this weekend.

After opening as a large group, our family of four visited the children's ministry area, the junior high room, our senior pastor's office, and the new sanctuary. We held hands, stood in a circle, and prayed aloud in each place.

And I cried.

Sitting in the room where I'll teach Bible study, I listened to Audrey pray:

"Dear God, Let Mom speak only what you want her to say and what you want these women to hear from you..."

Sitting in "our" new seats in the new worship center, I listened to Emma pray:

"Dear God, Let everyone who sits in these seats hear your Word and understand your Word and love your Word...."

My heart ached and my eyes teared up and I was awed and humbled. They pray with such power, such passion, such confidence. And they're eleven and nine. I can only imagine how they'll continue to grow. O God, what a gift you've given me in my girls. Help me love them well.

Of course, they also pray with their eyes open, because they both said, "Are you crying, Mom?"

Parenting, memorizing, hobbling

Oy. Last night was a hard parenting night. Let's just say that by the time we got home from dinner and got everyone in bed and dried all the tears that I was exhausted and ready for bed.

So I'm feeling thankful this morning that "the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations" (Psalm 100:5). It's not dependent on me. God is so much bigger than that.

I'm off and hobbling* this morning--but wanted to be sure to have a spot for you to link your Memory Monday (on Tuesday--again--sorry!) post.

I've got Psalm 100 down pretty well, but I'll say it again: I miss having the girls memorize with me. It's SO MUCH EASIER with a partner or two. All the gals at Bible study are memorizing this, but I'm thinking that as a leader I could have encouraged us to partner up in our groups for some accountability. Next time, for sure!

(*So here's why I'm hobbling this morning: My foot fell asleep in a meeting yesterday afternoon, I stood up quickly and promptly twisted my ankle and fell down because I didn't realize just how asleep it was. It made a yucky noise. Ew. Graceful like a ballerina, that's me. It's sore and a little swollen this morning, so no running for me today. I think it's mostly stiff and am hoping it'll be all better by tomorrow. I'm thinking maybe Toben could do that slap/rub thing from Karate Kid later if it's still hurting tonight. Was that Karate Kid? It's been years and I don't remember for sure.)

I am officially rambling now. Time for more coffee.

By the way, I loved your Saturday plans lists you shared. It's fun to get a little glimpse of everybody's day, isn't it?

Valentine

 Dear Toben,

 

 Love, Joanne

Secret agent for a day

I am sometimes amazed that anyone reads my lists, but then I remember that I always enjoy reading other people's lists, and besides, this is what's going on in my head tonight. Bear with me!

I'm really enjoying working again. I like what I'm doing.

At the same time, it's hard to work at home. I do, and I have in the past, but being at the church today for some meetings made me realize that I really do like "going" to work. 

I got to walk through the new worship center our church is building. Wow. Wow. Wow. (And I stood on the stage and told my imaginary audience to open their Bibles...a girl can dream!)

I love writing Bible studies. I'm so excited to teach at church starting March 24. But I'm having a hard time finding a regular time to write. Between my Bible study homework, my own study, teaching the girls, working with Toben, and maintaining the usual household stuff, I'm feeling like I need an extra hour everyday when the whole world stops--all except me.

Wouldn't that be cool?

I wish I had more time to talk on the phone with my friends. I miss them and feel like I've done a terrible job at keeping in touch lately.

I watched a couple of episodes of Glee the other day. And I'm hooked. I love the music. I want to sing like that. And move like that. Emma's been singing lines of "Don't Stop Believing" all evening. From the bathroom where she's taking a bath I keep hearing things like "Just a city boy..." "took a train going anywhere..." Love it.

I've decided I like the weather in Phoenix. A lot. The trees in my neighborhood are all blooming and chilly here is around 60 degrees. Not -6. I kinda like that. Spring in February is definitely a good thing.

I miss my sister. She and her family just moved into their new house in Denver. And I want to go see it and take her something fun for it.

My attitude this morning stank. No other word for it. Woke up feeling the kind of words my mother taught me not to say. Asked God to fix my attitude, went for run when I wanted to go back to bed, and by the time I got back, it was better. Not great, but better. And despite a rough start, it ended up being a good day.

Audrey made lasagna for dinner. So yummy! And so proud of my girl. She's getting so grown up. Sometimes it makes me really excited, other times I want to run screaming for the hills.

I'm starting to embarrass her. And I kind of do it on purpose because it makes me laugh to see her so horrified! She and her BFF act very shocked when her BFF's mom (my dear friend) and I sing and dance around the kitchen. But secretly, I think they know we're cool.

We're reading Old Yeller for school. Such a good story. I'm totally going to cry--I just know it.

The girls both want to homeschool again next year. I think I do too. We're talking about it as a family and praying about it.

There are days I wish I could do whatever I wanted--days when I really don't want to do geometry. 

I am having coffee with a friend tomorrow--and we're going to have a conversation from start to finish. Without interruptions from our kids. Hooray!

I should probably go work on Bible study, but I'm tired and my brain feels mushy. Think I'll go brush my teeth and wash my face and take out my contacts and (::pause:: Emma just came to tell me she needed a hug, stopped to hug her) get into bed with a book.

If I could be anything for a day, I think I'd be a secret agent kinda like Angelina Jolie in Mr. and Mrs. Smith. 

What about you? If you could wake up tomorrow to a different life, what would you want do for a day?

A big announcement (And nope, it's not a baby.)

So I've thought and thought about how to say this, and I'm thinking that the direct approach is best. We've got some news...

We're staying in Arizona for another year!

Remember how God kept pointing out Isaiah 43:18-19 to me last month about making a way in the desert (here and here)? I suspected God was specifically saying we would be staying in Arizona another year. But I sort of doubted it at the same time, wondering if I was reading too much into it. So I didn't really say much. Instead, I asked for more information and determined to wait some more.

All along, we've said that we would obey God and go where he said. Go where? He wasn't saying. It seemed that what was most important was for us to determine that we'd obey no matter where he said to go.

And all along, we've said that be it returning to Denver or staying in Phoenix, we'd be really happy and really sad. We are beyond blessed to feel so at home in two places.

Then last week, we got a phone call from the pastor at church and rushed off to a meeting (I hadn't even had a shower yet--I think I beat a record for showering and getting dressed and getting to a meeting on time) in which he asked us to stay another year and run twoignite again next year.

We said we'd think about it and pray about, but it was pretty clear that it was God. Because here's the thing, wherever we live, we need a job. Pretty important detail.

And so we are staying here. And we are really, really excited. And we are really, really sad. 

Excited to continue to develop some incredible friendships. Excited to stay at this church we love. Excited to be warm. (Yep, it's just about warm enough to hit the pool today.) Excited to know what's happening in July when we really expected not to know until March or even April. 

Sad to be far from family (especially now that my sister is back in Denver and having her third baby in April). Sad to be far from dear friends we love. Sad to not have our stuff and live in the house we love.

But above all? We are grateful. 

We inquired of the Lord and he responded. So much sooner than we'd anticipated. Grateful that there's some level of certainty about our near future. Grateful for the opportunity to continue to work together. 

Grateful that when we ask for direction, for guidance, God gives us. He is good!

Dear Mom

Dear Mom,

I'm really missing you today and feeling like we're too far apart. Sending a card or a gift in the mail isn't quite enough when what I really want is to be with you on your birthday and to tell you in person how much I love you.

If we were in Denver, the girls and I would stop by for coffee, then suggest a day of treasure hunting. We could wander through the big antique mall on Broadway, looking at books and tea cups and whatever else found our fancy. We could have a girly lunch out in Littleton, and then sit by the fire in the afternoon and knit a while.

(And I'm realizing that this is what I'd want to do for your birthday--and didn't even ask what you'd want to do! But I sort of think you'd like this too.)

But there are too many miles between us this year, so here's what I suggest. Let's celebrate your birthday exactly one month late. You'll be here and we'll have birthday meatballs at IKEA, do our best to find some antique stores, hit Trader Joe's on the way home, and have a birthday dinner of whatever sounds good to you.

We can eat mint ice cream by the fire on the patio, and visit until we get sleepy.

How's that sound?

In the meantime, happy birthday. I love you. No matter what gift I could give you, it wouldn't come close to the gift of having you for a mother. I'm so thankful God chose you for me!

Love,

Joanne

Happy birthday, Emma!

Meet Emma. My baby who is somehow nine, NINE, today! Who will be two whole handfuls this time next year, as Miss Patti (her favorite grownup outside the family because she gets down on her level to talk to her and is always interested in what Emma has to say) is wont to say.

Emma, who loves steak and American Girls and her cat Pumpkin and helping her mom do just about anything and the color turquoise and loves to snuggle and isn't feeling so small anymore and whose hair is long enough for pigtails again and who has the gift of a happy heart and a cute dimple on her nose.

Emma, who finally met her match yesterday in a steak too big for her to finish.

 

(Yep, she had birthday dinner in her pjs! Wouldn't you?)

We celebrated her special day a day early since her Papa was in town. Donuts and balloons and birthday candles and steak and potatoes and artichokes and a mint chocolate ice cream cake.

And we thanked God for technology that allowed us to have a virtual party with Gran and Aunt Kristen and Uncle Wade and Ava and Tyson. They got to sing to her and watch her open presents and blow out the candle on her cake all thanks to Skype.

 

But as Papa said, "It's good to be on this side of the screen where the cake is real!"

Teaching the kids to grocery shop

 

We're doing a new thing around here in the new year. Audrey and Emma are doing their own laundry (can I get an Amen?) and they are both planning and shopping and cooking a couple of meals a week.

They're really excited about it. Well, about the menu planning, grocery shopping, and cooking. They're not convinced that laundry is fun. Yet.

Here's what we're doing. 

The girls flip through their cookbooks (Emma got a stack from Gran for Christmas) and pick out what they'd like to cook. A breakfast, a lunch, a dinner, and a snack.

They make a list of those recipes, noting which cookbook and page it's on. And they make a grocery list of ingredients they'll need. (After last week, they've decided to organize their lists--all the produce together, all the frozen food together, etc. Let's just say we did a lot of back and forth-ing!)

On the day we shop, they first shop at home, crossing off anything we already have. Then they each get their list and a pencil, their own cart, and off we go!

 

 A couple of things:

• I do review what they want to cook to make sure we have a balanced meal. But I don't review their lists. That's up to them. If we have to go back because they forgot something, we have to go back.
• This is fun if you decide it will be fun. Except for getting run over by their carts. I HATE getting hit in the back of the heels with a grocery cart. Ow!
• It's going to take more time. Lots more time. Especially the first couple of trips. So expect that and it'll help with deciding it'll be fun.
• After last week, the girls learned to organize their grocery carts, how they put stuff on the conveyor belt, how to put all the bags back in the cart, and how to pack the car. (Bread goes LAST! Heavy stuff goes FIRST!)
• And, yep, part of grocery shopping is putting the groceries away when you get home.

Here's their stack of cookbooks:

 

You can sort of see which ones they use if you click on the picture to make it bigger. There are loads of kids cookbooks out there--check places like libraries, Goodwill, and used bookstores. Ones with pictures are great. And ones with simple recipes with clear, easy directions.